#aww. I’m going to miss this series and its chaos

[unsightlymuse]

Hermes: “Well, you know, Jay, I have been running for a long time. My entire life, which is about four million of your lifetimes. And, I don’t know if it helps or not, but it doesn’t stop. And there’s nothing bad about that, ‘cause there’s energy in it. And sometimes it’s nice to slow down and look out and…enjoy the view but, there’s nothing like the wind in your hair. So, if you’re gonna go fast, ✨at least have fun with it ✨��

*friendly but also slightly unhinged laugh (like always)*

[diorsluv]

casual , part 11

“ but we’re ”

series m. list previous chapter next chapter

( socialmedia!au )

yourusername

liked by luca.fantilli, rutgermcgroarty, and 111,103 others

yourusername ur favs are back 😈😈

tagged: luca.fantilli, rutgermcgroarty, markestapa, edwards.73, vivianliu

view all comments

username10 aww this is my fav type of post

username1 BUBBLES

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_alexturcotte 1/3 of these pics have some sort of suffocation going on… are you guys okay

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_quinnhughes i thought u said vivian wasn’t going with u guys

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trevorzegras you need to invite me

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markestapa ngl that card game was fire

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luca.fantilli we never hang out anymore 😔

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rutgermcgroarty you have no good photos of me do you…

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→ luca.fantilli not possible bro u can’t change a “thing”

username93 luca, rut n mark r dressed up as powerpuff girls like TELL ME IM WRONG

lhughes_06 i don’t like this horsing around mess

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→ lhughes_06 respect your elders

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mackie.samo i shouldn’t have left i miss you

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rutgermcgroarty

liked by colecaufield, yourusername, and 100,004 others

rutgermcgroarty its national best friend day look its my best friend

tagged: yourusername

view all comments

yourusername it’s not national best friend day 😑

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username29 ooooo the bf’s getting called out

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username18 minecraft besties so aesthetic

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markestapa the way she’s barely at your shoulders LMAOOO

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username14 guys what if the bf posts her but it isn’t ethan

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luca.fantilli best friends but u dont even have pics of her 🙄

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edwards.73 ik what ur tryna do

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_alexturcotte deliberate beef (?)

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lhughes_06 mhm 🤨

→ rutgermcgroarty i thought u supported my aspirations

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username45 are u trying to make ethan jealous

username89 one day they’re gonna get into an actual fist fight

next chapter notes ) so… i was going back over old chapters of feather and i realized they used to be SO short??? like why did i suddenly start making everything longer but for the sake of the plot and my sanity i’m ACTUALLY going to be reverting to my old ways this time (not lying!!!!) and it’ll be easier for me to get chapters out 😭

tags: @dancerbailey3 @hughesfein @loveforaugust @alwaysclassyeagle @love4ldr @inhoodmood @bunting58 @crazycat-ladys-blog @smoooore @bunbunbl0gs @lilasianmeat

[nebulablakemurphy]

Miss American Pie

Chapter Two: The Perfect Partner Project

Warning!: This series features a romantic Yelena Belova x Fem!Reader pairing. Please keep scrolling if that’s not for you. 💜

Summary: After you’re freed from Dreykov’s control you team up with Yelena and Natasha to take down the red room.

Chapter One : Chemical Subjugation

“I thought you had a jet?” Yelena cocks her head to the side, as you approach the decrepit helicopter.

“I asked for one.” Natasha mutters, under her breath.

“This isn’t a jet.” You add, the closer you get, the worse it becomes.

“I realize that!” The man who’d been standing with his back to you whips around to defend himself. This must be Natasha’s friend. “But you know what you didn’t give me? Time. Or money. I’m not made of jets.”

“Aww, he’s sensitive.” Yelena coos, “I see why you keep him around.”

“I’m not sensitive.” He protests.

“Of course not,” you smirk.

“Listen you-“ he breaks off. “Who are you again?”

“Y/N Y/L/N,” Yelena introduces you, climbing aboard. “She’s my partner….” She shrugs, “you name it really.”

“Partner works.” You chuckle, joining her in the cockpit.

“If you say so,” Yelena waves a dismissive hand. Getting a feel for the controls.

“Wonderful,” the man acknowledges your title.

“Thanks for the ride, Dick.” You salute him through the front window.

“It’s Rick,” he calls back.

“I know.” You give him a thumbs up. Waiting until he turns back to his conversation with Natasha. Taking the opportunity to lean down, kissing the top of Yelena’s head.

She cranes her head back to see you.

You nuzzle your nose against hers, until an exaggeration throat clearing tears you apart.

“We don’t have time for this.” Natasha, of course.

Yelena scowls at her, “yeah, yeah.”

Breaking Alexei out of a maximum security prison using only an earpiece, stowed inside of an action figure is a terrible plan. Nearly as bad as using him for information on how to locate a facility that’s impossible to find, run by a man who’s too slippery to kill.

That doesn’t stop you though. Generally speaking it’s going well. Until one of Yelena’s shots triggers an avalanche.

“Woah.” She marvels at the scene before you, her masterpiece. “Now this would be a cool way to die.”

“Yeah,” you holler back, sarcastically, over the chaos.

“You were getting no where with your tiny guns.” Yelena points out.

“Slow and steady wins the race,” you remind her.

“Fast is better. Solves problems.”

“And clearly creates new ones.” You jerk your chin toward the mountain.

“Get us out of here!” Natasha’s voice blares through the headset.

“I’m on it.” Yelena assures her. Moving into a better position for extraction. “Watch the side window.”

At her request you shuffle to the main ship. The prison guards are still putting up a fight. Inmates running in every direction.

“Alright, Natasha’s with us.” You confirm, once she’s secured her place on the black hanging rope. “Circle between the walls on your left to grab Alexei.”

“Yeah, no problem.” Yelena snarks, steering the plane away from another explosion.

“You’re doing a great job.”

“Don’t lie to me!”

“Fine,” you huff. “The spot is tight and the angle is bad. I don’t know how you’re gonna pull this off.”

Yelena is silent, processing the information. “Lie to me a little.” She amends.

“You got this.” The blinding wall of white threatens to swallow Alexei whole. You’re holding your breath too as the rope moves past the metal bridge he’s standing on.

“Well?” She yelps, impatiently.

“I don’t know. I can’t see.” Once the snow and ice clears, you spot two figures carefully scaling the rope. “Yelena?”

“Hmm.” She hums, expecting the worst.

“I knew you had it.”

“Yes,” Yelena sighs, before falling into easy laughter. More invested in this than she will ever admit.

————————————————————-

Unfortunately, entertaining as Alexei may be, he has next to no information about Dreykov.

Instead he drawls on and on about how the man wronged him. Stuck him on that “boring mission” in Ohio. Then tossed him in jail and threw away the key because of…hair? A party?

You weren’t entirely sure. You excuse yourself to the vacant seat beside Yelena. Giving her thigh a reassuring squeeze.

Full lips twitch up into a grin.

“Tell us where the red room is.” Natasha grumbles.

“I have no idea!” He shouts, and then in Russian. “Why don’t you ask Melina?”

“Mom Melina?” Yelena whips her head around.

“We thought she was dead.”

“You cannot kill a fox that swift,” Alexei sucks in a breath.

You choke on your own saliva.

“Ew.” Natasha winces.

“What?” The man shrugs. “She was the master mind. His architect.”

“Are you telling me that Melina works for the red room present day?” Natasha leans closer.

“Yes,” he nods. “Remotely, outside Saint Petersburg.”

“I don’t think we have enough fuel for Saint Petersburg.” Yelena decides, after checking the needle on the gauge.

“We’ll make it.” Alexei waves away her concern.

“Ok,” Yelena mutters.

You look over at her.

“We’re not going to make it.” She mouths, with a shake of her head.

You smirk, closing your eyes and relaxing into the seat. It’ll be nice while it lasts.

Before long you’re falling into a controlled crash, at the Saint Petersburg city limit.

“So,” Yelena jumps out onto the dirt. “Are we there yet?”

“No, you will know when we are there.” Alexei begins snorting like a pig.

——————————————————————-

You take a seat in the chair opposite Yelena inside Melina’s humble abode. Her pigs can be heard carrying on out in the yard and Alexei’s early snorting makes perfect sense now.

Your eyes dart around the three women at the table uncomfortably as noises continue erupting from the bathroom. “Everything alright in there?” You bellow, loud enough for your voice to carry down the hallway.

Another groan is the only response.

“Let’s drink,” Melina’s voice breaks the tension. She fills each of your shot glasses in turn.

“Thanks,” you raise the clear liquid and toss it back. Feeling it burn it’s way down your throat before going back for another.

After a moment a clunking from the doorway calls your attention.

“It still fits.” Alexei announces, having stuffed himself into his old costume.

Melina whistles, with a slow clasp as he approaches the seat at the head of the table. “I never washed it once. Come eat.”

He hums a tune under his breath, reliving days gone by. “Look at us, family back together again.” If you didn’t know better you’d think it was sweet, he seems…happy.

“Well,” Melina swallows, dishing mashed potatoes onto his plate. “Seeing as our family construct was just a calculated ruse that only lasted three years, I’m not sure we can use this term anymore.”

“Agreed,” Natasha perks up. “So here’s what’s going to happen-“

“Reunion then.” Alexei offers instead. “I want to say something right off the bat.” He says to the woman who’d once been his wife. “You haven’t aged a day. Just as beautiful and supple as the day they staged our marriage.”

Melina moves closer, “you got fat, but still good.”

“I just got out of prison,” he confesses, “I have a lot of energy.”

“Ooohooo.” The older woman exhales.

You can’t help the bubble of laughter that forces its way from your chest. Covering your mouth with your hand as Yelena takes another shot.

“Please don’t do that.” Beside you Natasha looks physically ill as she protests. Swallowing down her disgust she begins again. “So listen. Here’s what’s going to happen.”

“Natasha don’t slouch. You’re going to get a back hunch.” Melina flicks her fork in Natasha’s direction.

“What? I’m not slouching? I don’t slouch.”

“Eh, listen to your mother. Up! Up!” Alexei joins in.

“I told you, I don’t want any food.” Yelena pushes her plate away.

“Eat a little something Yelena, for God’s sake.” Melina says, piling food onto her plate.

Yelena groans.

“Are you kidding me? Stop it all of you. This is ridiculous.” Natasha bites out.

“Me? I didn’t do anything. That’s not fair!” Yelena argues.

“It’s true, she’s just sitting there.” You shrug.

“Here’s what’s going to happen,” Natasha roars, effectively silencing the room. “You’re going to give us the location of the red room.”

Melina purses her lips, avoiding the topic. “It’s like when you told them they could stay up to catch Santa Claus.”

“That was fun!” Alexei recalls. “Look out girls, he comes down the chimney. And when the cookies are gone you know he is there.”

Melina clicks her tongue.

“What? I want them to follow their dreams, shoot for the stars girls.”

“No good.” Melina disagreed.

“Killing Dreykov isn’t a fantasy. It’s unfinished business.” Natasha looks between the two of them.

“You cannot defeat someone who commands the very will of others.” Melina says, softly. “You never got to see the culmination of what we started in America. After the perfect partner project was rejected, we took a different route.”

“The perfect partner project?” You repeat, racking your brain. You’ve heard that somewhere before.

“Why’d Dreykov scrap the project?” Natasha’s voice cracks like a whip.

“I don’t know.” Melina’s eyes dart down to her plate.

You can see that she’s lying.

“That’s when we turned our focus to chemical subjugation.” Melina continues, “the control is so profound that when the subject is instructed to stop breathing. They have no choice but to obey.”

Yelena shakes her head. Perfect lips turned into a frown. Hazel eyes glistening with tears as they meet your own.

“That’s enough.” You warn the older woman, seeing the expression. The last thing you want to do is cause her anymore pain.

“No.” The blonde insists. “Tell me more about the partner project.”

“Yelena, we don’t have to do this.” You shake your head.

“Yes, we do.” Yelena slams her fist against the table in frustration.

“The extraction was messy to start. A high profile missing children’s case in North America. But the bond was very strong. Enhanced through targeted conditioning and subliminal messages. Until something happened that Dreykov did not anticipate.”

“What happened?” Natasha wonders.

“The girls became…attached.” Melina’s mouth twitches, “so they were separated.”

“Do you know who they tested on?”

Melina’s guilty eyes land on you. “I am sorry.”

“No,” you suspected, maybe. Somewhere in the back of your mind. You spent the first six months in the red room under solitary confinement. Rapidly and rigorously conditioned in a matter of weeks instead of years. Preparing you…for her. The teenager girl you couldn’t stand, the woman you eventually came to love.

“You,” Yelena laughs, although it’s not particularly funny. “Us.”

“Yelena-“ you reach for her hand across the table.

“Don’t,” she snaps. “Don’t tell me that it will be ok. They stole your life because of me. I never asked them to do that. I never asked for you!”

“I know.” You assure her. None of this was ever her fault.

“That’s right, because you know everything. Don’t you, Y/N?” Yelena scoffs, her hands balling into fists on either side of her dinner plate. “You know what I think. You know what I feel. Look at you. Ready to come out of your own skin because I am unhappy. Prepared to move mountains, prepared to start wars.”

“Like you’re any better.” You challenge, she knows you like the back of her hand.

“That is my point!”

“I’m sorry that this happened.” Alexei interrupts. Surely gearing up for a ‘father of the year’ speech. “But we are here now. All together! Wasn’t that worth a few years of-“

“Shut up!” Natasha growls at him. “You are an idiot.”

No response.

She moves her attention to Melina, “and you’re a coward. You’re a coward. And our family was never real. So there’s nothing to hold on to. We’re moving on.”

“Never family, huh?” Alexei throws up his hands. “In my heart I am simple man. For a couple deep undercover Russian agents I think we did pretty great as parents.”

“Yes,” Melina nods her agreement. “We had our orders and we played our roles to perfection.”

“Who cares? That wasn’t real.”

“What?” Yelena’s voice breaks.

“That wasn’t real.” Natasha repeats for emphasis. “Who cares?”

“Don’t say that. Please don’t say that. It was real. It was real to me. You are my mother!” Yelena all but sobs. “You are my real mother, the closest thing I ever had to one. The best parts of my life were fake.” She pauses, drawing in a steadying breath. “And none of you told me.”

You swipe at the tear that escapes your eye. Traitorously running it’s way down your cheek. It was never fake. Perhaps arranged, but never fake. The way you want to wrap her up in your arms, protect her from her own sadness. The way your heart breaks in time with hers. That is real. It has to be.

She turns back to the woman who she considered a mother. “Those agents that you chemically subjugated around the globe…that was me too.”

Finally she addresses Natasha, “and you. You got out. It is impossible to escape. Are you going to say anything?” A pause. “No.”

She pushes her chair from the table, taking the bottle with her as she stands. Turning her back in the four of you.

“Yelena.” Natasha calls after her. Guilt eating away from the inside out.

“No.” Yelena dismisses her a second time. Moving into the next room and closing the glass doors behind her.

You look down at the plate of food in front of you, now lacking any appeal.

“I had no idea.” Melina whispers, wringing her hands.

“I’ll go to talk to her.” Alexei offers, rising to his feet.

“About what?” You hum, “how you handed her over to a life of pain and suffering at the age of six? How you experimented on her? How you didn’t come back for her? Yeah. I’m sure that’s just what she needs right now.”

With that you excuse yourself, back out to the front yard. Slowly circling the perimeter of Melina’s cottage. Not looking for anything in particular. Just killing time until someone produces information about how to get to Dreykov.

The blinding light that appears moments later catches you off guard. A team of men exit one of the three circling planes. Since you couldn’t find the red room, this is the next best thing.

—————————————————————

Waking up is disorienting, coming to from a tranquilizer always is. It’s bright, almost blindingly so. It takes a moment for your eyes to adjust. You attempt to use your hands to cover them, only you can’t move your hands.

Leaning up as much as your restraints will allow you discover that you’re strapped to an operating table. And you’re not alone.

“Yelena?”

“Miss American Pie,” she drawls from a similar position. Neither of which gives you much chance to escape whatever fate awaits.

“You’re not allowed to die mad at me,” you grumble.

“I’m not mad at you.” She blinks slowly, as the surgeon marks a clean line at the perimeter of her hairline. “I’m just mad.”

“Yeah,” you let out a laugh, turning back to the light above the gurney. “Me too.”

“You are my perfect partner.” She murmurs, while gloved hands busy themselves with preparations. “I don’t know if that makes it better or worse.”

There’s a beat of silence between you. Acceptance…peace. “I love you, you know.”

At this Yelena smiles. A genuine, happy, smile. “I know.”

Something to remember her by.

The syringe at your neck releases a sedative into your blood and you fall asleep. One last time.

—————————————————————

Dying is peaceful, gently rocking in the ocean. Then swaying more violently, giving you the urge to be seasick. Your body should move with the force of it. But something holds you steady, something warm.

“Yelena?” You croak.

“Not quite, but there is resemblance, huh?” A different voice greets you.

“Alexei?” You realize, pushing yourself into a sitting position.

“That’s a girl, up you go.” He says, clapping a hand against your back.

“What happened?” You ask, “where’s Yelena?”

“Still inside,” Melina confirms. “Brought you here so you’d be safe.”

“Natasha?”

“They’re coming.”

You sigh, ready to jump out the open door of the hovering chopper.

“What are you doing?” Alexei demands.

“Going to find them.”

“Wait! Y/N, wait.” He pleads. “There’s something I must tell you. I tried to tell Yelena but I don’t have earpiece.”

“What?” Your brows furrow.

“Never mind that.” He shakes his head. “The point, is you were right. What you said about Yelena. We complete our mission, we move on. But losing her, losing my girls is my biggest regret.”

“I’ll tell her, don’t worry.” You give his shoulder a squeeze.

“Please let me finish.” He stops you again. “She carried your unconscious body through burning building, through explosions. This is not easy, you are very heavy.”

“Oh, Alexei!” Melina scolds him.

“Not that.” He amends, “you know what I mean. It is dead weight.”

You nod, “sure.”

“I look at you together and I see true love and I am happy. You are family now, and this time…we are going to stay together. We’re not leaving without you.” The older man says, helping you onto the metal grate of the falling red room.

Not a second later an explosion rings through your ears, sending Melina, Alexei and your get away vehicle spiraling to the ground.

“It’s the thought that counts,” you’ll make a new plan.

You run toward the flames and gunfire. “Yelena!” You call out, searching the surrounding area.

“Y/N,” Natasha finds you. “What are you doing?”

“I can’t find Yelena.”

“I thought she was with you.” The woman frowns.

“Well she wasn’t!” You bite out, fear and frustration getting the best of you.

“Don’t worry, we’ll find her. You go-“ the red head pauses. Her eyes focused on something behind your head.

You turn to follow Natasha’s gaze. Finding her. Yelena. The wild, unpredictable, firecracker of a woman. On the wing of the jet with Dreykov inside.

“Yelena! Stop!” You rush over, realizing what she’s about to do. Her staff poised at the propeller.

She pauses at the sound of your voice.

“He’s not worth it.” No one is worth it. Not when she is the cost.

Yelena smiles, eyes alight with mischief, “I love you, you know.”

“I know.”

Natasha tries to reason with her. “Don’t do it!”

“This was fun.” Yelena tells her sister, jamming the propeller and effectively destroying Dreykov’s jet. The force of the explosions sends her backwards, hurtling towards the ground with the remaining pieces of the red room.

“Put your pack on and jump.” Natasha tells you. Rushing for the nearest parachute. “I’m going to save my sister.” She dives head first over the edge, without putting on her harness.

“Not if I get there first,” you challenge. This would be a cool way to die.

Chapter Three: Bye Bye

[nemuitoka]

What are your favorte jshk fanfics? also where do you like reading them the most?

Hi Anon!!! today is the day I can finally answer this question😈 ahaha you know how much I enjoy making fic recs so 👀 Let’s go!!!

To answer your second question first, I like reading them on AO3 the most! Mostly because I get almost unlimited number of characters to rant in the comment section........... 😆but also the tagging system is very helpful.

Okay, now to the fun part of this ask😏

You said JSHK, but I mostly read Hananene ones so all of my favs include that pairing... as  I already did a fic rec here of my favs, this list will continue that one, so please check that one first hehe ((I apologize in advance..., I would love for people to recommend me some mitsukou ones tbh... I’m really lost when it comes to other pairings orz)) 

If I’m completely honest with you anon-san, my favorite JSHK fic right now is the one Roxanne ( @istoleyourboat )  wrote based of my art and her snippet:

Star-Crossed and Falling- Where Stars Go to Die by lilaflo

Hanako is Princess Nene’s personal knight 👀. A tale of forbidden love. They slowly fall in love as they exchange a series of gifts, one that includes a pair of matching earrings that remind them of their love when they’re apart. Also, jelly Hanako of Nene’s suitors😏... Oh, but nothing lasts forever and those sweet moments will come to an end when they have to face their cruel reality, in this world, they don’t get to choose neither their battles or the ones they love.

Now more of Roxanne, because I seriously enjoy her work so much (I’m sure everyone knows by now lmao sdkj) 

Night of the Phantom King by lilaflo 

This one is a spooky one. Nene’s regret for never realizing who she truly loves takes her to mourn her deceased friend Amane and cry on his grave in a Halloween night, then suddenly the Phantom King comes to take her away👀 & he looks suspiciously familiar... Beautiful world building btw, also the ending is just, excellent. 

12 Year Romance by lilaflo

Amane meets Nene at the Tanabata festival, she’s older than him, but he falls for her instantly, fast forward, Amane is now in middle school, he’s a troublemaker, & gets constantly into fights, but he swears the new school nurse looks familiar... he then realizes it’s her and thinks it must be fate!!!... This one hits close to home bc I’ve been in this situation irl, so I can confirm all of Nene’s struggles are real (and ofc how a love with an age gap should be handled the correct way, this fic really teaches you many life lessons hahaha) 

took a sip then another sip, then you turned and said to me by chivalrousamour 

This autor has a bunch of good JSHK fics!! I recommend you check their AO3 out, bec you may find something you like for sure! But, this is my absolute fav from them. Nene is a mangaka, celebrating the finishing of her long serialized manga, while Amane is a delivery boy who happens to find her in a very questionable state in her house👀 (it’s all family friendly ofc, anon, I’m not a slimy pervert like some ghost boy)

Maid for Each Other by corologs ( @corologs )

Courtney has this amazing College AU collection series that I encourage you to check out!!! But Maid for each other is my fav!!! So it’s the Yugi twins birthday, and it’s Tsukasa’s turn to choose where they go to celebrate it... you can already tell where this is going... (let the chaos begin) & as the title said, it involves maids!!! (it has Kaicho wa maid sama vibes if you liked that anime~~)

If I Could Tell Her by corologs

What if the picture perfect arc plan was successful??? Well, this fic explores this idea, and it’s very interesting to read. I like how Amane and Hanako are two separate people here.

the horizon tries but it’s just not as kind on the eyes by sincerelyand ( @sunlightinourheadlights ) 

(Oh my sweet Karen, she writes such good fics, so go check her AO3 out as well!!) Amane and Yashiro are friends that share an apartment (& they were roommates-- OMG they were roommates), even if Amane has its complains, because Nene can be a handful sometimes (and in denial of her true feelings as always, are we even surprised at this point?) he loves her dearly anyways😭.

for real, this time by sourlemoncandy  ( @sour-lemon-candy )

Did somebody say fake dating AU?????? Because hell yeah I did asajj I loved reading this so much!! Nene and Amane are childhood friends, and Nene overhears some girls talking about Amane and how one of them plans to ask him out... but she senses these girls are up to no good so she... well, you gotta read it to find out more~~ it’s no fun If I tell ya everything hehe... so go go go!!

lemon cream by sourlemoncandy

Amane and Nene, just two good friends having a road trip and sharing donuts... what could go wrong??  😏 seriously, I loved this fic so much!! Instant fav! Also makes me wanna try some good sweet donuts...

Trip Down Memory Lane by insipidenvy ( @insipidenvy )

This fic is so sweet. I have such a huge attachment to it, because I read it when I really needed some fluff in my life hahaha. It’s sort of a collection of memories between Amane and Yashiro’s relationship over the years. So heartwarming... if you need the fluffs you’ll enjoy this very much!!

The Radish Princess and the Toilet Prince by insipidenvy

This is my favorite fic from insipidenvy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You know how I am a slut for Royalty AUs so that’s why!!!!! Also Toilet Prince!! hahahaha such a good nickname lmao. I love how they bond over their insecurities, it’s very relatable tbh. 

Between Wind and Water by WingSongHalo  ( @wingsonghalo )

My beautiful Wing always delivering the good Hananene content, as she should!! This fic is so fun to read!! I laughed so hard at Nene and Hanako being awkward with each other!!! So you know how Hanako is super clingy with Nene, he’s always touching & hugging her, but this time something weird happens and he’s so distant~~ Nene doesn’t want to admit it at first, but she misses his clingy ghost boy~~ you’ll have a good time reading this for sure!  

The Monster's Bride by Hammsters ( @uglierdaikon )

Have you heard about the myth of Cupid and Psyche? Well this fic rewrites it in a very Hananene way <3 hehe I loved it so much (as I’m a huge fan of mythology~) To sum it up, Nene is fated to marry a monster that lives in the mountains so she’s devastated... to her surprise, her husband is far from what she expected... she only had one rule to obey and well... we all know how reckless Nene is so... you go find out what happens next now!! hehehe

Morning Reflections by FalalalaLa  ( @miss-sternennacht )

So you’ve heard of Hanako watching Nene sleep, but what about Nene watching Amane sleep???!! this fic offers you this and so much more fluff <3 Also Nene remembering how they met and how their relationship evolved during the years, aww <3 

Cursed Coin by DaikonSenpai  ( @daikonsenpai )

There’s a school dance, Yashiro’s supposed to be dancing with Kou (since she can’t go with Hanako, which causes him to be jelly~~ and bitter), but she loses a coin Aoi gave her for good luck so she goes out and searches for it on the last place she saw it, the school fountain. Suddenly Hanako spots her, what’s she doing outside??? is she drunk or something?? what happens next you may find out when you read it~~~

Between Love and Hope by Baronesscmd (SweeterThanYourDarkestSin) ( @baronesscmd )

Oh to be Nene and get to sleep between the Yugi twins... God really has favorites uh... ISTG, this collection of fics is so cute. I love how Nene loves the twins so much in this AU, they have their little cute family. She ofc is in love with Amane, but their relationship with Tsukasa is so tender... it’s mostly this trio having fluffy moments together to heal your soul... if you need some, you’ll get it here for sure hahaha. 

Ghost of You (And All the Futures We've Forgotten) by Indigo_Floof  milkteamoon  ( @indigosienna , @spades-queen )

So anon you may have been wondering, well this bitch likes fluff only???? how about some angst for a change, uh? DAMN, OKAY THEN, here you have some angst to rip your soul out and wish you never sent me this ask in the 1st place, bec of the emotional damage this fic will leave you sdajjsa, also if you liked “Erased”, you’ll love this fic too! 

Hanako of the Opera by zxrstan

Finally, but not less important, me being annoying about Hanako of the Opera & POTO AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!! This fic is based of the AU Aidairo created mostly, it’s really fun to read if you didn’t get much of what was happening during the Hanako of the Opera event, it has a nice ending also! very satisfying I must say. 

AAAAND THIS IS THE END OF MY ALL TIME FAV LIST OMG;;;; Kudos for me for searching through all my damn AO3 and Google Chrome history (from both my PC and phone, since I am a FOOL and forgot my AO3 password so I read a lot of these in the past as a guest before recovering my password LMAO, please be patient with me omg, and also if you see me bookmarking them now, you know why 😭) 

Kudos to all of my writer homies as well, I love and appreciate all of you so much!! you have no idea! 💖

I hope you find this list useful, anon!! Thank you for sending me this ask and have a wonderful day! 

Ps. Please everyone feel free to add more fics to this list if you want! this is all my personal picks, but I’m aware there are a lot more fics that I haven’t read and deserve as much recognition as the ones I listed!

[dearestones]

Just the Usual (AE-3803 x U-1146)

Warnings: Fluff, implied established relationship.

Anonymous Request: Maybe something for Cells at Work with Red Blood Cell and White Blood Cell? 👀

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AE-3803 yawned sleepily as she left the premises of one of the normal cell apartments. It had been a long cycle due to a series of bacterial invasions alongside a slew of viruses just waiting to enact destruction upon the body. As much as 3803 would have loved to stay and watch the immune system enact justice upon such foul creatures, the red blood cell found herself steadily ushered back into the bloodstream and away from the chaos.

Now that her shift was almost over, the young red blood cell was busy returning her cart back into its proper holding when she spotted one of her favorite cells in the body. Tall and formidable, U-1146 gave her a jaunty wave before hurriedly jogging towards her side.

“Miss Red Blood Cell!” The white blood cell greeted her. His usually stoic features were upturned into a kind smile and his cheeks were somewhat flushed with enthusiasm upon seeing her so long since their last meeting. “I haven’t seen you in a while.”

Elated that her dear white blood cell friend looked just as enthused to see her as she was, she tucked herself against his side while still mindful of steering her cart. His warmth was comforting and soothing, a combination that loosened 3803’s tightly coiled muscles and eased the stress that had been steadily mounting ever since her shift had begun. Ever the hard worker, she had barely any time to have any breaks and as such, her cell body was showing wear and tear.

“I’m doing well, Mr. Neutrophil!” She nuzzled a little into his side. Taking the hint, the immune cell took hold of the other side of the cart’s handle so that the both of them were manning it. “Although, work has been piling up ever since I’ve become a mentor to NT-4201.” She shook her head, slightly rueful but proud of herself as she reported her suspicions, “I think the higher ups are starting to trust me more.”

The bright grin she sent in 1146’s direction had the granulocyte warming on the inside. As a neutrophil, he couldn’t quite blush as dark as his companion considering his consistent pallor, but he imagined that if he could, his cheeks would be just as bright as her hair. Laughing slightly, he wrapped his other arm around her waist and kissed the top of her head.

“I’m so proud of you, Miss Red Blood Cell. Perhaps you’ll be mentoring larger groups of new erythrocytes like your mentor before you.” 1146 felt rather than hear 3803’s little hum of appreciation as she nuzzled a little against his side. “Although, if that is the case, I hope that your promotion isn’t going to take too much time away from me.”

3803 patted his arm comfortingly, a bright smile on her face as she looked up at him.

“Aww, don’t worry, Mr. Neutrophil! I’ll always make sure to spend time with you.”

Together, both cells continued until they finally reached the center for red blood cells. There, 3803 exchanged her cart for a basket of complementary glucose. At the sight of the basket, 3803 immediately grasped the handle and began tugging the neutrophil away so that they could spend time at her apartment.

It was a peaceful walk on the way.

1146 regaled her with stories about his squad defeating the bacteria of the day while 3803 responded in turn about her latest escapades to the lungs and heart. Laughter and smiles were shared all around when the white blood cell revealed that U-4989 had once again didn’t comply with regulations concerning their weapons and equipment when he had managed to launch a mound of endothelial cells at the attacking Staphylococcus attack. While it was effective, the backlash from their superiors led to 4989 getting a stern hearing from both 1146 and U-2001.

Once inside 3803’s apartment, they sat close on the couch and continued their conversation while eating the food.

(Well, it was mostly 3803 eating considering that 1146 couldn’t metabolize glucose).

Soon, though, both cells began to feel the stresses and the tensions slowly ease from their bodies, leaving behind a pair of tired cells aching for a good night’s rest. As 1146 offered to clean out the basket and to wipe the crumbs off the couch, 3803 busied herself with preparing sleeping clothes for 1146. The both of them blushed at the kindness in her gesture, but 1146 took it more in stride as he hastily dressed himself.

As they climbed into bed, 3803 curled up around 1146’s side, making sure to wrap her arms around his middle. Meanwhile, 1146 held her hands loosely in his, relishing in the feeling of comfort and safety that he barely felt whenever he was on the job.

Together, their breaths evened out and mingled in the night air.

It was just the usual way to end their work cycle, but it was theirs.

Just the usual.

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If you want to donate a Ko-Fi, feel free https://ko-fi.com/devintrinidad.

HATARAKU SAIBOU (CELLS AT WORK) MASTERLIST

[craftypeaceturtle]

A is for Arrival...?

Summary: Remus and Janus are shopping ready for the new arrival for their family.

Note: The start of an AU and series because I’m just a sucker for any type of familiar sides. Romantic Demus and Royality.

Next Part: B is for Baby Time

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“Hey Jay?” Remus suddenly stopped; his eyes enormous. 

“Yes, dear?” Janus put on a dramatic Victorian tone, his spine straightening with his hand frozen poised with the packet of washing up sponges. 

“Do we need to get birthday stuff?” Janus immediately scrunched his face, “No wait! Listen. You celebrate your kid’s birthday every year so surely you celebrate his first ever one ever. Right?”

Janus stared into the distance as he dropped the sponges on the floor, “Call your brother.”

“No,” Remus whined but still pulled up his phone and promptly shoved it into Janus’ chest, “He’ll only make fun of me if I ask it. If you ask it, then maybe he’ll presume he’s the stupid!”

“Did he celebrate Logan’s first ever ever birthday? What would you even call it? First day of existence?” Janus frowned as he speed dialled the number. 

“If he did, he didn’t invite me!” Remus shrugged before picking up the sponges. He immediately crowded into Janus and smooshed himself into his shoulder. 

They picked up on the second ring, Patton’s sigh answering. Something that they probably weren’t supposed to hear. “Hello Roman. We just have a quick question,” Janus chirped. 

“Hey Janus. It’s Patton by the way. Wow, another question, huh?” Patton, meanwhile, gave Roman a stern look and thrusted the phone at him again. Roman pulled a face as he shrugged and ducked back down behind the sofa. Frowning, he put it on speaker so they could both suffer, “What did you want to ask?”

“Should we celebrate our baby’s first ever day? Like a birthday but for their very very first birthday?” 

“What!” Roman shrieked before leaping back on to the sofa; ever so suddenly finding the strength to talk. 

“What do you mean ‘what’! God, he’s such a douche,” Remus muttered.

“I’m a douche, oh am I? Why would you celebrate a baby’s first ever day. It’s their first ever day in this world! They get overwhelmed and scared so easily. It’s a big scary world out there and you’re going to shove a party in their face! The baby is barely old enough to move it’s own hands! It’s a baby!” Roman complained while Patton giggled.

“To treat this seriously for a second, when you finally get your baby, the very last thing you want to do is mess around too much. After all this time, all that waiting, you finally get this tiny fragile baby. A tiny itty bitty baby. All you’ll want to do is just sit there and watch them quietly. A party is the last thing you’ll think to do. Heh, me and Roman even forgot to eat that day and only remembered hours later,” Patton spoke softly with his own memories uplifting his annoyance. Roman smiled and knocked their shoulders together. 

“...So is it worth buying like finger food in case we forget to eat?” Remus interrupted.

“Uh... yeah? I mean, yeah that would work,” Roman fumbled.

“Okay. Cheers. Bye!” Remus called out while Janus rolled his eyes, “Wow. We really need to get them something for putting up with all this.”

“Well I’m going to keep talking to them, you weirdo.” Janus ran his hand through Remus’ crazed curls but he was quickly shrugged off as Remus went to evaluate which bleach was best for their toilet, “How are you two?”

“Yeah, all’s good here! Just your typical day, what are you doing?” Patton chirped.

“Baby shopping mixed with some normal shopping. Extremely exciting, I’m sure you’re jealous,” Janus felt his voice go soft at just the mere mention of his coming baby.

“Aww! That’s so sweet,” Patton sighed, “I miss that so much about Logie. Baby clothes shopping is the only reason worth becoming a dad.”

“Oh Pat! Such slander, I’m impressed,” Janus laughed.

“Oh hush! Everyone knows that baby clothes are the best cutest things in existence. Aw, are you going to buy Halloween clothes! Me and Roman saw some adorable skeleton onesies today and I came this close to buying it for the baby.”

“Yeah, I think at this point we’ve bought him more Halloween clothes than normal baby stuff. That’s the whole reason we still have to do some shopping. There were these pumpkin shoes and socks. Oh Pat! I swear if I wasn’t so macho and cool, I would’ve cried. Baby shoes are just so tiny!” Remus raised a brow at his squealing voice. But then he also knew exactly what Janus was talking about just from his tone alone. Those shoes were actually pretty cute. 

“They are right! Aw, do you know any more about the baby?”

“Well...” Janus drawled while Remus took a breath. They agreed that Janus was going to deal with this breaking news.

“We met up with the mother yesterday.”

“Oh! My! Oh! Oh, Jayjay! That’s amazing! How was she?” Remus quickly snatched the phone and flicked it to speaker. Janus raised a brow at him but he was only met with the most mischievous smirk back. He frowned but turned back to continue talking only now with Patton’s voice squeaking out across the aisle. 

“She looked exhausted. I felt so bad for her. Meeting up for a coffee looked like the very last thing she wanted to do,” Remus said. 

“Bless her,” Janus sighed, “She was lovely.”

“Aw, that’s good. We never really got to meet our surrogate, how come yours wanted to meet?”

“Well, she apparently had a bit of a health scare. All is good! Everything is all good! But she just wanted to sit down with us and actually go through everything that happened. So we sat and talked about the health of the baby. Again, all is good obviously. But... so... we may or may not have found out our baby’s gender,” Janus winced once the squeal erupted over the phone. Remus cackled at the amount of people who turned to look at them with dirty looks before he turned the speaker off again. Ah, yes wouldn’t be a trip to the shops if Remus couldn’t spread some mild chaos. 

“What’s their gender!” Patton screamed before launching up from the sofa. Roman was giggling as Patton jumped up and down and spun him around. 

“We’re having a boy!” Janus smiled. He would deny the glow in his chest for this rest of his life but he couldn’t help but grab Remus’ hand. Remus smiled, thankfully, and squeezed his hand with his own lovesick smile. Their baby boy.

“Oh a boy!” Patton squealed high enough for dogs. 

“Typical, not one girl in this entire family,” Roman chuckled. 

“Oh congrats guys! When’s the due date again?” Patton sighed.

“10th of December. I almost feel bad for the boy. He’s going to have to put up with the whole Christmas birthday combination.”

“I’m still upset that he wasn’t a Halloween baby,” Remus frowned. 

They chatted for a few more minutes before Janus finally hung up. They were still holding hands- they would look exactly like a couple from a lovey film if they actually dressed like normal people rather than Disney villains. All they needed to do now grab was some more normal baby outfits. A very simple easy task. Just look at some clothes and chose some cute functional clothes.

But every single time... every single time, they would find the most abnormal baby outfits possible. That and they always spent a good ten solid minutes of staring at the tiny shoes. They looked like build-a-bear shoes. They didn’t even look real. 

“I can’t wait until he arrives,” Remus mumbled as he picked up a hideous orange dinosaur patterned jumper set. Janus tried to hide the smile but he quickly placed his head on his shoulder as they stood there. 

“Neither can I. He can’t come soon enough. Just like how you can’t put back that gross set soon enough.”

“You don’t like it! I think it’s cute.” Remus tilted his head as if that made it cuter. 

“He’s so not going to be an orange baby.”

“You don’t know that! Does he even need a colour?”

“You’ve got green, I like yellow. He also needs a colour. While we can still have control over what he wears at least,” Janus stated like Remus was a toddler trying to argue that the sky was green. 

“So we both have our ugly colours. Then he also needs an ugly colour too! Orange is a disgusting colour!” Remus thrusted the jumper in his face. 

“Oh totally exactly, dear,” Janus rolled his eyes before he then felt the passion erupt from him, “Okay. Firstly, for your information, yellow is a beautiful colour thank you very much. You’re the one that chose the grossest colour of green to embrace. He can have purple,” Janus winced as he guided Remus’ hand back down to the shelf. 

“Purple?” 

“Yes. A beautiful colour. Not only does it screw over superfluous ridiculous gender roles, it also is close enough to match our dress senses,” Janus stated with a proud look. Remus opened his mouth but then snapping it shut with a respectful nod. Yep, that sounded like a plan.  

They eventually found some normal tiny eeny weeny pair of jeans and they used all of their collective strength to stay clear of all the Halloween clothes and bought some presentable jumpers. Janus was finally starting to get fed up with standing around in a shop before he realised that Remus’ eyes kept flicking to a shelf behind them. 

He never made any move to actually go look at whatever it was and he never mentioned it. Janus found every reason to keep looking at the same pairs of stripey socks to give him time but he still said nothing. It was so uncommon that Remus felt shy about suggesting something. What could be the harm? “What you looking at?” Janus asked while exaggeratedly turning around.

“Um... I just noticed...” Remus drawled off. It was just a discount shelf. It was stacked with just random broken items that clearly no one ever take any interest in. Remus shyly sulked up to it and pushed aside the chipped mugs and torn notebooks without any hesitation. He pulled up a baby blanket. 

It was the exact same incredibly soft material all baby stuff was made from. The stuff where your hand magnetised to its softness. It was a quilted baby blanket in a pastel lilac. It was cute but it wouldn’t be on a discounted shelf without reason. There was a large smudge of black marker on its corner. But as Remus held it up, Janus laughed. It wasn’t quilted. It was sewn to be a spider web pattern around the blanket. Clearly an old Halloween gimmick. 

He turned to ask if Remus was all ready to go then and was immediately punched in the stomach. Remus was all teary eyed and awkwardly looking anywhere but him. His fingers brushed through the blanket over and over again. 

“Oh Reem,” Janus cooed and tugged the blanket from his grasp but he didn’t let go.

“I don’t even know why I’m tearing up!” Remus pressed his arms against his face. Janus felt himself tearing up as well. Something about how Remus’ voice would go all wobbly and pitchy when he was on the edge of tears just always got to him, “Just... oh this is so fucking stupid.”

“Well you’ve got us both crying in a shop at 9 in the morning. I’d say it sounds pretty dumb,” Janus smiled.

“Just... he could be our little spider. Just like how I’m your octopus and you’re my snake,” Remus’ voice was practically crumbling away. Janus felt a disgusting childish tear slip down his face.

“Oh Reem.” Janus hugged him, only so he didn’t have to experience the embarrassment of people seeing his husband’s gross taste in blankets of course. 

“How much spider stuff have we bought him! Like that would be perfect. And this is purple and spider!” Remus felt a tear escape his control too but he just buried his nose in Janus’ hair. 

“Oh you are such a nightmare of a husband. I’m taking you back to the husband shop and refunding you,” Janus groaned, he broke away and snatched the blanket from his grasp and shoved it into their trolley. At least it was cheap. Plus they would probably end up staining it with gross new born baby vomit anyway. 

[serena-hart-09]

A Story’s Analyzation Chapter 8: Normal Day~ It’s a normal day~ It’s only a normal day~

Summary: Mc talks with Solomon... and also bonds with Leviathan and Beel. *sigh* finally.... the grand entrance of the “new character” really shocked me.... Well, anyways I hope you like this chapter! As always have a great day ahead!

“*sigh*”

A long sigh leaves from Lucifer’s mouth as he looks at the perpetrators of the scene, Mammon and Beelzebub. Mammon positively looks like a scared animal and Beelzebub looks like a kicked puppy. He begins as he sighs for the hundredth time, “So, how did the kitchen and Mc’s room end up like this?”

This meaning, completely destroyed.

Mammon lets out some ‘ums’ and ‘ah’s as he stutters while trying to explain. It is Beelzebub who finally give him a concrete explanation, “Mammon ate my pudding, the one that I specifically labelled as mine. I saw him eating and I lost…. My composure….” He looks down, guilty, as he finishes his explanation.

“…I see.” Lucifer thinks for a minute as he looks at the now disinterested Mc, who was laying down on the love seat of his room looking up at the ceiling, actively ignoring everyone in the room. In their own world. Mc hasn’t said one word since the incident and quietly followed him with his two brothers in his room…..

“Mc.” He calls them. He is then met with the most tired face he has seen in his life. As if they are tired from just breathing. He coughs, to avoid laughing in this situation, “You will be living in Beel’s room for the time being until the kitchen and your room are repaired.”

“Ok.” They say simply, they then continue looking up at the ceiling. ‘What has happened to this human?’ he thinks. The room is silent after the lukewarm response.

Silence is not forever, you know?

“OI.” A certain demon of greed shouts to get the attention of the other people in the room.

“No Mammon.” Lucifer cuts before he can say anything.

“But I haven’t even started!”

“I know what you will say, so, no.”

“But!”

“No.”

During this, Beel looks at the human with curiosity. As he feels something is out of the place. Something that should have happened, regardless of the situation… ‘A pact. A pact with Mammon….’ He thinks as he continues looking at them…. And then back at his brothers who are still….. fighting? Having a conversation? Debate? He wasn’t sure as he was tangled in his thoughts…about it all….. at the surface it didn’t made sense….  Why should he be worried? At all? This means that it is good that Mc doesn’t have a pact with his brother for his protection?

…

It didn’t made sense…

He looks back at Lucifer and Mammon….

…

They are still going on…

He should probably stop them…

“Mammon its okay I will live in Beel’s room as planned…”

All the brothers look at Mc. They seem far too disinterested for some reason…

They look at Beel with a tired smile, “So, can you help me bring my stuff from my room?”

“Yeah, sure.” He smiles, forgetting the thoughts he had before.

 **********************

There was a lot of stuff that was not damaged….

Currently, Beel was helping them move some of their stuff like clothes, other daily necessities and stuff. While the stuff that they won’t use everyday but will use it when needed were kept in boxes.

“Beel.” He looks up from his work to see his brother, Leviathan.

“Mhm?”

“Lucifer is calling for you; I don’t know for what but he says he wants to meet you in his study or something.”

“Ah, ok thank you Levi.” He smiles but he is ignored as Leviathan looks at one of Mc’s stuff and lets out one of his big infamous ‘WOOOOAAAAAAHHHH’s.

“That’s- that’s the limited-edition booklet of TSL!” Leviathan runs towards the book like its his last food in Devildom. “Ahhh, I always wanted this! I lost the chance to get it 4 years back and now its in front of me!”

“That is Mc’s stuff.” Beel tells him with a straight face.

“Huh?”  

“It’s their stuff.”

“No way! This can’t be that normie’s!”

“Who said I am a normie?”

A voice comes from the door, its Mc who is looking at Leviathan as if a mother was giving her child, The StareTM . “Plus, don’t you think it is rude to touch other people stuff without their permission?”

Levi looks away in embarrassment, “I-I mean, I was just surprised is all…”

“Alright. What about the ‘normie thing’?”

“Um-uh I thought that you were a normie….”

“…Do you like the TSL series?”

“Huh? Of course, I love it!”

“Oh? Who’s your favourite character?”

“The Lord of Shadows! He is the best!”

“I know right! I love his character development too! Like how he went from a cute and shy baby to confident and responsible!”

“I know! I like his friendship with Henry!”

“Oh, my Devildom! Me too! Eyyyyy! High Five!”

Though, no clap was heard….

“Eh…. Leviathan?”

“…” He looked away, blushing. “I-I should go… Or else I’ll miss the latest episode of ‘Oh no! I’ve been trapped in a game and the game master is after my soul so I must break some rules of the game to annoy them and escape with my lover and his family to the real world!’”

“Oh…. Um is it new?”

“Yeah just last week it aired its first episode… um so…. i-if you need my help… you can uh-um call me!” he runs away hiding his face in his hands.

“…”

“…”

“What was that?”

“I don’t know either, but it was very cute! Hehe!”

Beel looks at them smiling.

“Uh Beel? Didn’t Lucifer call you?”

“Oh. Alright.”

Ah, it is quite peaceful..

 ***********************

“AHHHHHHH!”

A very familiar scream was heard in the class. With the scream however, there were gasps and many disappointed sighs….

Mc sighs again while looking at Mammon, it seems he some how chanted the spell incorrectly and now he has turned into a cat and in a dog, now in a rat… The professor seems to try his best to remove the curse…. Though it’s impossible as Mammon is jumping everywhere in panic….. Satan too is trying to help him with no avail….

They sigh again….. as the class is now in chaos… their morning had been chaotic their afternoon? Well, with their reaction for this situation….as if something more chaotic happened resulting, into them being numb to their surroundings. It seemed that at this point they wanted to go home or die… either works for them. ‘Is their anything else that I have to see today?’

“Why are you sighing so much? What is he? Your disappointment of a child?”

They look up, back straightening.

‘This guy…… Of course….’

Solomon.

“No, I am just tired.”

“Hm… Well, it seems that class won’t return to normal for the next 47 minutes…. How about we talk?” he sits beside them…. A little too close.

“No thanks. I have way more better things to do than talking to you.”

“Oh~ come on. Just a little chitchat?”

“No.” they try to get up from their seat.

…

?!

…They can’t? Mc looks at Solomon in shock, his smug face is all that they need to understand..

“You cursed my seat?”

“Hehe…. It seems you are not as naïve as I thought you were…” he smirks at them.

“Oh? Did I disappoint you?”

“Not at all.”

“….What do you want from me?”

“You know that very well…” he moves himself near to them…. So much that they are one would think that they were kissing… he whispers in their ears, “I want a pact with you….. that’s all I want…”

“….and you think I will give it you?”

“Of course not, best things come with a price….. well, what is yours? Tell me.”

“Your heart or soul then.”

“Playing hard to get?”

“I am just stating my price….”

“You know I can’t give you that.”

“Then the deal is off.”

“Is there something else that you want?”

“No.”

“There has to be.”

“Tch. I already told you I’m not interested.”

“Why?”

“Hm…. I am sure you know the reason very well.”

“Aww, are you still mad at me?”

“Oh? Was I not very clear?”

“Bummer.”

“Madman.”

He only laughs, “It’s alright, maybe one day……. I’ll be able to convince you or maybe fate will, who knows? Truly who knows of the future, right?”

“Shut up.”

“Mc-”

“Solomon.”

Both of them look up to find, Lucifer staring intensely at Solomon.

“You should sit a little away from Mc.” He speaks in a threatening voice.

“Oh, good evening Lucifer! Why are you here?”

“A certain idiot cursed himself. So, I am here to clean the mess. Now, move.”

“Alright. Alright. Mc, Lucifer, have a good day.” And so, he leaves the both of them alone.

“…”

“Mc-”

“Thanks.”

“Oh, well, you did request the favor from me so-”

“Let’s go and help Mammon.”

“Mc-”

“Shit, did Mammon just turned into a monkey?”

He looks at said monkey…. This will take while, huh?

…

 *****************************

 “Ah, Diavolo. Good evening.”

“Good evening to you too, Mc. I am sorry if I disturbed you.”

“No, not at all I just finished my homework so I was already free.” They say stretching their arms. Today they had a lot of homework it was all easy so it didn’t take them much time.

“Ah.”

“Though, its quite rare for you to call me.”

“Ah, yes I wanted to call you regarding my-”

“Your sister? I understand. When do you want to meet?” they were glad that they were alone. Beel said he was going out to run an errand and also to go to Madam Scream’s promising them that he will bring them one of his favourite shortcake.

“…”

“Diavolo?”

“Its just….. Why do you know my sister?”

“…..I think that discussion needs to be done face to face, Diavolo

“…. You are right.”

“Is there anything else you wanted to talk about?”

“….Yes.” ‘He sounds serious…’ they think ‘must be something important..’

“So, what is it?”

“Mc….. Are you and Lucifer finally dating?”

…

“Diavolo…. Why are you so hellbent on matchmaking Lucifer and I?”

“Because you two look cute together!”

“Why?”

“Hm…..”

“Diavolo.”

“Alright! We’ll meet each other again on Friday after classes!”

“Fine.”

They sigh setting their D.D.D. down on the bed.

…

Something….. feels out of place….

….

Their neck… feels like its burning….

It feels good…..

So good….

So warm…..

“Mhnnn.”

They moan.

It feels so-

…

?!

Wait what?

They touch their neck just to feel nothing…

…

What was that?

‘Whatever.’

They go to the bathroom to wash their face they look in the mirror-

‘Wait.’

They had a giant mark on their neck…… which very suspiciously resembled that of one of the brother’s sigil…….

‘Wha-’

But then in a flash it disappeared…

…

Was it the sigil that was doing weird things to them before?

‘What is happening?’

… There was one man- I mean Demon who could answer them…. Without being overly suspicious of them… and then obsessively observe them on a daily basis….. the one that seemed like he was mentally stable…..

Satan.

So, they walk to his room and knock gently on his door.

“Oh? Mc? Did you need help with something?”

“Ah, yeah…”

“Come on in then.” He smiles softly.

“Mc?”

They turn around to look at the eldest.

“Lucifer?”

“I was searching for you….. I wanted your help with something…… if you are free, would you please come in my study with me?”

“Um Lucifer I-”

“They are not free, Lucifer. They needed my help with something… about curses right?” he smiles at them though his words are full of venom.

“Oh? Maybe I can help you, Mc?”

“Uh no Lucifer…. This time only Satan can help me….hehe…” they smile apologetically.

“…”

“Anyways, Mc come in. You, get back to your work.” He looks at Lucifer, bored.

“Excuse me?”

And then Satan slams the door on Lucifer’s face.

“Dude…”

“I always wanted to do that! Hahaha!”

“Pfft-”

Both of them laughed for 2 minutes straight.

“Anyways… what is it you want my help from?”

“Ah, yes, I wanted you to talk to you about something. Its, -“

…

Then, only static was heard….

….

They tried again…. And even then only static was heard… again….

They look at Satan and he looks like he is frozen in place, like a statue.

“…”

They took a deep breath…

“Satan could you teach me more about History of Devildom?”

“Of course!”

….

This seemed to work, huh.

…

‘What is really happening?’

…

“Satan?” they look at him and now… he is only staring at them?

“…”

“Satan.”

“Hm? Oh yes, sorry I-”

“Its ok. So, let’s get this over yes?”

“Yes!”

….

It’s weird….

Its….. wrong…

  **************************************************************

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*

It has been a while, Reader did you enjoy the story so far?

Oh? its slow? Well, many stories need a lengthy plot to progress forward you know?

So, did you finally find the clues I gave you in the story?

Ahahaha!

Good. Because you will need them. Even the ones in the future chapters…

*sigh*

That fool… he finally entered in here huh?

Reader, don’t worry that psychotic idiot won’t do anything to you…….

For now.

That man is an idiot, after all, he is chasing after you, the person beyond this screen.

Not the Mc, not the “Reader”.

You, Y/N.

Hm, or rather, [Name] or [reader name] are also some ways to refer you right?

He is nothing but puppet controlled by someone else…. Yet he thinks that he has broke those chains…. Poor soul, he does not even know that he is still being controlled.

But who am I to change one’s fate?

I am not a God nor a Demon nor an Angel….

To be honest, he still is struggling to write/talk, sometimes talking in codes…..

He will fail….

No matter what….. that is certain….

And then, he will go back to the same scenery that he hated so much……

Understandable, because he was all alone…..

In his world, he alone came to know the truth after all.

Even if he is playing the role that is given to him he is merely doing it get in contact with the Mc………

*sigh*

Next time, maybe, it will be him you will meet….

But let’s hope Tohei comes back too…. They are worried about you…..

Maybe, they know that the interference is him.

…

Please be Safe…

All of us would hate it if something were to happen to you…

[sociallyawkward--fics]

I Will Wait and Hope

Part of the “Power of Love” series

Part 1: I Have Loved You For a Hundred Years  [ao3]

Part 2: Certainly Fucking Feels Like It  [ao3]

Okay, full honesty, I don't know if this holds up to the standards I wanted to keep this series at. I feel like it's not as good as the other two, BUT I've had it written for weeks just staring me in the face and I figured there's not much more I can do unless I rewrote it, which I didn't want to do, so I'll let you all form your own opinions! Also, I tried giving it a last couple edits but I have a possible migraine coming on, so if I missed anything that would be why lol.

I hope you guys enjoy this one as much as the other two!

Summary: Geralt's done the hard part, he told Jaskier how he felt and broke the news of his immortality. Telling Ciri what's going on should be easy. Right?

Word Count: 1284 words

[ao3 link]

----------------------------

They didn’t stay at Yennefer's for too much longer. Winter was approaching fast and they only had so long to travel from where Yennefer’s up to Kaer Morhen before the paths became too dangerous for Jaskier and Ciri, or before the passes closed from the snows. They spent one more night at Yennefer’s (in which Geralt and Jaskier made wonderful use of the soundproofing spells Yennefer had enchanted all the rooms with, thankfully uninterrupted by Ciri).

Yen saw them off the next morning, tossing her usual insults at Jaskier, having a heartfelt moment with Ciri, and even going so far as to give Geralt a hug. She pulled him aside as Jaskier and Ciri finished packing and began readying Roach.

“You did the hard part,” she said. “You told Jaskier you were in love with him, and that seemed to go quite well. Now, you need to explain the situation to Ciri.”

Geralt resisted the urge to deflate. Emotions, opening up, having conversations; it was all too much for him. Things used to be so much simpler.

“Oh, grow up, Geralt,” Yennefer said, though not unkindly. “You need to be having these conversations with her, and she deserves to know what’s going on. Both with you and your bard, and with how she plays into all this.”

“Fine.” Geralt said.

Geralt did not tell her that day. Or the next day, or the day after that, or the day after that. Jaskier kept shooting him looks, but he never said anything since Ciri was always around. On the rare moments they had alone together, always brief, Jaskier would always tell him that he understood that it wasn’t his place to tell Ciri for him. He immediately followed that with, “So tell her already because she can see that you’re on edge and it’s making her nervous as hell.”

At least Jaskier always peppered his prodding with kisses.

And it wasn’t like he was wrong. Ciri had been edgy lately, skirting around Geralt more and more as the days passed, watching him carefully out of the corner of her eye. Her scent had gone from its usual rose-sweet to something sour and rotten with nerves. She seemed too nervous to even talk to Geralt, and hadn’t hugged him since the morning he let her go to the market with Yen.

They were a week out from Kaer Morhen when Geralt finally broke.

Mostly because Jaskier started withholding kisses until he got over himself.

“Let’s talk,” Geralt said stiffly.

Ciri looked up from where she was fiddling with her dagger on her ratty bed. The inn hadn’t had many rooms left (and they hadn’t had much coin), but it was the best they could manage, even with Jaskier paying off the rest of the sum with a performance downstairs. Geralt patted the edge of he and Jaskier’s (also shitty) bed and she slowly made her way over and settled next to him.

“There’s something we’ve been meaning to tell you,” he said, still just as awkward.

Ciri glanced at the door. “We?”

Geralt hesitated. “I. But it involves Jaskier. And you.”

Ciri fidgeted with her hands in her lap, avoiding Geralt’s gaze. “Did I do something wrong?”

Geralt’s eyes went so wide he thought they would bulge out of his head. “No!” He said, too quickly and too loudly.

Ciri flinched, making Geralt wince.

“No,” he repeated, somewhat more controlled.

Geralt took a few moments to try and figure out what he wanted to say, but he never had been good with words. That was Jaskier’s department, not Geralt’s. Not to mention that it had been under two weeks since Geralt learned he had emotions and he hadn’t quite been able to process that properly, yet, even with Jaskier’s help. Decades of habits and thought patterns were hard to unlearn.

Ciri, unfortunately, was not as patient as Jaskier, and not as used to Geralt’s tendency to take too long to formulate his thoughts and answer questions.

“Geralt?” She asked, voice shaky.

Just get it over with, Geralt thought. Like severing a damaged limb.

That wasn’t the best analogy. This was why Jaskier was the famous bard and poet, not Geralt.

“Jaskier is immortal.”

Ciri jerked back a little and blinked. “He’s what?”

“Immortal.”

“How did Jaskier become immortal? Did he… do something with a god of some sort? Or did he drink something weird again? Like that time he drank the funny potion and his hair and skin went pink for a whole week?”

Geralt let out a heavy breath, grateful witchers couldn’t blush. “No. As Yennefer explained it, my… love for him was so strong that it became infused with chaos and magically linked our lifelines.”

Ciri’s shoulders relaxed for the first time in weeks. “Aww,” she cooed teasingly. “I knew you loved him all along!” She gave him a cheeky grin. “And I knew Yennefer’s plan would work to get you together.”

Geralt scoffed, but couldn’t hide his smile. He scrubbed a hand against her hair, ignoring her yelps of protest as she tried to shove his hand away. After finally shoving him away, she scooted over to settle against his side. Hesitantly, he draped an arm over her small form.

“Roach is also immortal.”

Ciri nodded against his ribcage. “That makes sense. Otherwise she would probably be too old to carry you.”

“And,” Geralt started, ignoring the quip for the moment, but cutting himself off and clearing his throat to buy himself some time. “Yen said it may affect you, too.”

Ciri pulled away and looked up at him. “Please don’t tell me I’m frozen at twelve.”

Geralt shook his head and tried to remember what Yennefer told him. “She said… the magic surrounds you, but it’s not exactly affecting you the same. At least, not yet, because you’ve still been growing. It may come in later in life, you could stop ageing in your early twenties or so, but she’s not sure how it’ll manifest on you.”

Ciri wrinkled her nose.

“As Yen said, ‘the magic of love is a fickle thing.’”

“That’s weird.”

Geralt shrugged. “It’s pretty weird.”

She turned another cheeky grin up at him. “But now you’re stuck with us!”

“Seems so.”

Jaskier came back to the room barely minutes later, glistening with sweat and grinning wildly from his post-show euphoria. He set his lute case by the door next to Geralt’s swords, grin growing impossibly wider when he saw them curled together on the bed.

“I take it the oaf finally made an effort to communicate?” He teased, striding toward the bed.

Ciri giggled, then fake gagged as Jaskier leaned over to give Geralt a peck on the lips.

“Gross,” she said.

“You’re gross,” Jaskier replied, wiggling a few fingers into her side to make her squeal.

Ciri groaned. “I can’t believe I’m stuck with your grossness for immortality.”

“Get used to it sweetpea,” Jaskier said, pressing a more lingering kiss to Geralt’s lips. “Immortality is a pretty long time.”

And frankly, Geralt was fine with that. 

Multiple lifetimes of Jaskier’s music and teasing and kisses. Multiple lifetimes of Ciri’s sass and cheekiness and warm hugs. Multiple lifetimes of having a family (or, at least, a family he saw more than just for a few months every winter).

Geralt pressed a kiss to Ciri’s temple, chuckling at her continued squeals of “gross,” and leaned over to accept yet another kiss from Jaskier (and he was certainly getting as many as those as he could, now that they were no longer being withheld). Jaskier would probably say he “could get used to this.” Geralt didn’t know if he ever would.

But he at least had the time to try.

[studiobeebo]

Above & Below [1/5] (Kirishima Eijirou x Fem! Reader)

ayy so thanks to some v kind anons i got the motivation to start working on the mermay series and the first one up is for Kirishima! its a bit short but i hope you guys like it! happy mermay!

“So you’ve really never been past the beach, huh?”

“There’s not really much I could do about that, y’know.” You chuckled out at his question. As interesting as you thought it would be to magically grow legs like the mermaid princess in that story Kirishima had told you about, it wasn’t very likely that such a thing could or would happen.

“Well I know that! I guess I just think it’s unfair..” He hummed, sitting up from his position next to you laying down close to the shore of the beach.

He had planned to only come visit you for a late lunch or early dinner, two sandwiches and juice boxes to match in hand, but he had ended up staying way later than he had originally planned and decided he might as well just watch the sunset with you. The two of you hadn’t known one another for long, maybe a month or so, but he valued you just as much as he valued any of his other friends, or maybe a bit more.

When he had first met you, he was surprisingly shocked. Merfolk were a rather common thing and they had become the ‘norm’ and lived in harmony with most humans. Some places even had farmers markets or craft fairs specifically centered around beaches and such so the merfolk’s creations could be shared and traded as well. It was an interesting harmony and both sides had much to learn from one another, yet for the longest time Kirishima had never actually met one despite living fairly close to the ocean. When he did find you though, humming to yourself while you bathed in the sun up on the beach, he was a bit stunned. If there was anything that all the stories, both fake and real, got correct it was that merfolk were certainly beautiful creatures that could leave any human frozen in their tracks. You had an almost unnatural beauty, like his brain couldn’t focus on how any being could fit every aspect of what he thought was attractive, but when you flat out asked him what he wanted after he must have been staring at you from ten feet away for a solid minute, he had to snap out of it.

At first, he was a bit awkward speaking with you. He was sure he was blushing judging by how hot his face felt, plus it was just strange speaking to a whole other species for the first time. When he finally left after learning your name and talking with you for a little bit, he couldn’t help but want to learn more, both about you as a person and what life was like as a mermaid, so he continued to come back. He visited you as often as he could, though with his school schedule his visits became more sparse which was why today, you were happy to spend time with him just laying out on the beach and talking.

“I guess it’s a little unfair since you guys can see more of our home than we can see of yours.” You shrugged, “But I don't mind. I’ve learned enough talking to you and a few others.”

“Aww c’mon, you’re not even a little bit curious?” He asked, because to be honest, he was still incredibly curious about your life, though he was starting to think that his interest lies with you rather than your lifestyle.

The first time he felt his heart start beating wildly in a way he had never felt before was when you had jokingly tried to ‘stand up’ to show him how ridiculous it would look if you tried to walk, before slipping almost immediately and falling into the sand next to him before bursting out into laughter. You looked like a bit of a mess with sand and some seaweed mussing up your hair, but you were your own beautiful chaos and he couldn’t take his eyes off of you.

After that, there were a lot of moments where he noticed his heart would race or his face would heat up out of nowhere, but whenever you asked about it he’d just brush it off and say he hadn’t been feeling well or something like that. He’d never really had a crush before, but he was almost certain that’s what this was, yet he wasn’t quite sure what to do about it. He highly doubted someone like you would like someone like him no matter how manly he tried to be. Besides, even if by some miracle you actually did like him back, he didn’t even know how he could work out a relationship with someone who couldn’t even be on land.

“Kirishima?”

He blinked and looked over towards you, his mind having been off track yet again as he realized you had probably just been speaking to him and he had completely missed it.

“Sorry what?”

“I was askin’ when you were gonna head home, dork.” You laughed, wondering what could be going through his head.

You’d noticed that he had been pretty spacey lately, but he was a pretty dorky guy and..not the sharpest tool in the shed. Despite not being the brightest, the rest of his personality definitely made up for it. It was shocking how someone could be so bubbly and positive all the time and you told yourself that his toothy smile could melt anyone’s heart and that it definitely wasn’t just you.

“Hm I dunno, guess it is gettin’ kinda late, huh?” He asked, though it was more to himself as he pulled out his phone to check the time only to be interrupted by a gasp.

“Oh hey, we never took a picture!!” You exclaimed, remembering the time where he had explained how ‘smartphones’ worked and showed you the picture taking function. You asked to take a picture with him then, but that day he had just stopped by quickly on his morning run before school so he didn’t have the time.

For a moment he didn’t know what you were referring to, but then he remembered that he had told you that the two of you could take a picture, but now that it was brought up again he felt nervous. Still, he couldn’t bare to disappoint you so he simply put on a smile and nodded, scooching a bit closer to you so you could both be in the frame as he pulled up his camera app.

“Oh c’mon, you’ll hardly be in the picture if you’re that far away from me!” You whined, quickly wiggling over behind him and abusing the opportunity to be closer as you rested your chin on his shoulder.

“S-Sorry..” He mumbled, his train of thought being cut off by the feeling of your chest against his back. After taking a moment to pretend he was fumbling with his phone so he had a chance to calm down, he finally rose it up again, before using his other hand to make a peace symbol to which you looked at strangely before copying his movements despite not knowing what it mean.

“Alright, ready? Smile!” He said, giving a bright smile of his own before snapping the picture.

He chuckled softly as you immediately gasped again and grabbed at his phone, begging to see it as you looked over his shoulder.

“Ah, Kiri you look so cute!” You exclaimed, not thinking much of your words at first, but when your initial shock over the fairly new technology subsided you realized how weird that might sound, but before you had the chance to awkwardly utter out an apology, he beat you to it, nearly shouting in your face with cheeks almost as red as his hair.

“Y-You look really cute too!”

The two of you stared at one another in an awkward silence for what felt like hours before you cleared your throat and moved away from him, looking everywhere but his eyes.

“Ah well, I’m starting to feel a bit parched so-”

“Oh yeah! I mean- I should be going to.”

“I figured..” You hummed, trying to hide the smile that was forming on your face in response to your heart thrumming in your chest.

“..Okay well I’ll see you soon then, right?” He asked, picking up the little bag of garbage from your meal and pushing himself up onto his feet before stretching a bit.

“Well duh, you can’t get rid of me that easily.” You teased, figuring it would be strange to say you checked the area everyday just to see if he was there so you’d obviously see him sooner rather than later if he was there.

“Well I wouldn’t want to get rid of you anyways..I’ll see you soon though, [Name]!” He spoke, giving you one last smile before waving you off and turning to head back home.

While you made your way to the shore and back into the ocean with a wobbly, lovestruck smile of your own gracing your lips, he was much the same as he walked home staring down at the picture on his phone that he had immediately set as his wallpaper. He didn’t quite know how to deal with it yet, but if this crush left him feeling like this, then maybe it wasn’t so bad after all.

[severalbakuras]

s2e17 and 18!

I҉̡̡͓̦̘̜̖̠͜ ̧̢͍̪͎̖̩̰͉̭̞̱͕̬̟̟̲̰͚̺͘T̷̸̛̞͈̙͇͇̠̼̀̕ ͏̞͕̩̣̩̳̺̼̘̭͉̞̀B̷̧̨̦̬͉̜͟͞ ̶̢̟̱̮̹̩̯̳͙͔̞͎̖̙͚̭͖̣̤͟͝É̡̙̗͖̫͇̤ ̤͓͔̮̺̺̩͖͙͘G͏̧̯͇̖̜̳̙̻̥̝̱̳̹̮͈̼̟̠͞ ̵̷̱͕͕̹̠̻̲̞̱͓̜̗̳͉̘͍͙̯I̷̶͜҉̪̼͚̫͖̬̖̦̬̤͕̥̬ ̡҉̶̖̼̫̹͕̗̣̖̙̯̻N̢̼̗̫͕̖̯̯̜̲͚͕̞̗͟͞ ͜͡҉̶̨̥̙̙͚̮̹͕̼͉͈ͅͅS̶̢͉͖͕̭̥͓̺͇͍͎ ̴̶̸̮͍̺̯̻̦̞̭̘̀͜

dipper and mabel vs the future: NIGHTMARE CHIN

they’re gonna be teeeeens

it’s not that great mabel trust

stan that’s not the only thing you’re going through…

even the mini-shack loses its s…

he’s not your personal gremlin ford. also hey what happened to staying away from the kids like you promised?

given your usual fixit standards just get some duct tape on there.

ford chill jesus just because you act like you hate stan doesn’t mean dipper hates mabel jeez.

oh mabel…

aw he wants to talk to her too…

aliens?

aliens.

familiarity breeds complacency ford.

it’s interesting that everywhere besides earth/’s galaxy has no issues countering bill’s nonsense as far as i can tell. i guess he picked earth/’s galaxy because it was the only place he could handle B)

aww mabel… this show happened fast too.

WHAT DID I SAY FORD

ford no.

ford no don’t turn him into you.

HIS PARENTS DON’T EVEN KNOW YOU FORD.

YOU DON’T KNOW MABEL EITHER FORD.

SHUT THE FUCK UP WHAT DID I ALREADY SAY ABOUT PROJECTING YOUR STAN ISSUES.

that’s STUPID advice ford!!!

NO PRESSURE FORD.

NO HIS HAT

check the rift soon dude that was a hard impact.

this whole time stan and ford haven’t even tried to reconcile this is going to end badly.

‘hold you back’ shut UP ford.

he almost died today mabel, several times.

mabel i get why it sucks for you but he’s not wrong. sad and bad things happen out of everyone’s control all the time and there’s nothing anyone can do about it but deal. 

blendin?

why are you here blendin?

do not trust.

ford ffs.

THIS IS WHY YOU NEED TO TELL YOUR FAMILY THINGS FORD SHE’D KNOW WHY THAT WAS IMPORTANT IF YOU J

AAAA BILL

how’d he snatch blendin up? what could he have possibly offered?????????

yeesh those are some bleak credits with all that screaming. v. second impact.

weirdmageddon, part 1:

here we go here we go here we FUCKIN’ GO

HE’S A REAL LIFE FLESH BOY NOW

he has organs that means he has blood and that means he can bleed.

and we all know what it means if something can bleed.

mabel no.

3-tier pyramid is a downgrade.

black with a neon rainbow border as a 2d triangle is an upgrade though. use that look more often bill.

i like his friends, i’m glad he has some.

GO MAYOR

DADFICA SUCKS ONCE MORE

WOAHHHHHH

NO GIVE HIM HIS DEPUTY BACK

oh this music’s good

but if chaos is the new order doesn’t that make chaos order and order chaos and thus the most chaotic thing to do would surely be not do what everyone expects you to do and leave with no harm done?

OOOOOH THE INTRO

BLOOD RIVER

gotta pause for some of those photos goddam

‘draw me like one of your french triangles~’

mahou shoujo bill cipher magica.

TEETH

i’d be down to watch the adventures of mill, dill, still, will and sill. (that sweater and the hat is legit cute won’t lie. damn u bill)

GNOMEPEDE

not quite dipper but your danger instincts are on point.

any plans to tell stan about this?

that’s a cool-ass tsunami.

GO SOOS

HE’S FREE

gideon’s lol-edgy at best.

YOU WANTED THIS???

HIS HAT’S FLESHY TOO

has he lost some of his all-knowingy ness or is he just basking in himself?

WOAH

bill’s got the terror blink-dash down.

having a shield over his eye means he doesn’t want you hitting his eye. that’s a weakness.

aaand there they go. didn’t think they’d survive the series.

that whale’s just chilling.

oh my god they’re nightmare nerds.

damn she’s dedicated.

woah dipper you’ve done pretty well surviving alone so far.

hey it’s attack on titan if the titans could talk.

TRAP

oh phew.

I SUPPORT BODACIOUS T

wendy owns.

awful kind of bill to label her prison.

MONSTER EDM PARTY

wait possessing? so he never made a deal and just took blendin by force? when did that escalation of his abilities happen?

ugggh time baby.

honestly i’m not even mad, time baby’s lame.

EYE MOUTH

you should be dude.

gideon was here.

NOO BODACIOUS T

it’s gone all mad max

of course gideon would turn.

fuckin’ nasty gideon.

GO WENDY BREAK THOSE BONES

DROPKICK THAT CHILD WENDY DO IT

LET HIM PHILOSOPHIZE BRAT

BIRDIPPER!!

ANIME!!

MEAT!!

LIVE-ACTION!!

oh dear.

SOOS!!!!!!!

SOOS, LEGEND OF THE WASTES, TELL ME OF THESE FOLKSONGS.

trust the prisoners gideon!!!

fucking finally gets a clue. we did miss soos throwing down though.

honestly i feel kinda bad for this guy, even if he eats people.

[bmaxwell]

Monster Hunter World

It happened while my character was hiding in the hollow of a fallen tree. I was trying to find a moment’s respite to pull out my whetstone and sharpen my bone katana. That’s a weird sentence for a few reasons. Let me unpack that before we go any further:

- First off, “bone katana” isn’t a euphemism for anything. Let’s get that out of the way. As an aside, my character is female.

- Secondly, it’s odd that I have to worry about my weapon’s sharpness constantly. It’s not uncommon to need to find a quiet moment to drag a stone across your blade a few times. Gameplay-wise, I don’t mind it. It adds another dimension to a pretty deep and engaging combat system. Logically, it’s hard to get my head around. I feel like Zack Morris gesturing to the camera for a timeout, only nothing around him stops.

I guess that’s only two reasons. Anyway, I was nearing the end of a long, drawn-out battle with a Pukei-Pukei (the NPC’s don’t pronounce that one the same way I do). It’s a big, weird dinosaur-bird hybrid that can fly in the same sense that a chicken can fly. Our battle had sprawled across the forest far from where it had started, and I’d kind of lost track of my surroundings - that happens a lot in this game. Battles rarely take place in a single small area. 

The Pukei-Pukei was tangling with my Palico (whose name is Kiki). I’ll come back to that. That’s when I hid in the fallen tree to sharpen my weapon. Suddenly my foe came crashing into my shelter, destroying it around me. That was a moment when I realized I had to switch away from video game logic and employ some real world thinking. That’s a cool moment.

A minute later after I had chased my wounded foe down a path, another one of the game’s emergent moments happened. The Pukei-Pukei paused to eat a mouthful of a poisonous plant, then he suddenly turned and started spitting poison at me. All the big monsters I’d encountered so far do some form of this. They have different behavior in different stages of the battle. Not unheard of, but still pretty neat. This always includes a phase where they are limping away from me, seeking the safety of their cave or whatever shelter they have. It’s a little disturbing because they are so well animated and also because I am a cuck libtard who has empathy.

Anyhow, at this point I noticed that my character was on fire. As is inevitable when one is on fire. I was confused because I hadn’t noticed the Pukei-Pukei breathing fire but it’s possible, I supposed, in the chaos of battle that I had somehow missed it. As it turns out, we had encountered a huge dragon. Whether we were on his turf or he happened upon us, I’m not sure. I only remember that there was fire and lots of running, and Pukei-Pukei had fucked off, presumably to some part of the forest with less burning. Something similar happened later where I was battling a Great Jagras, and a big T-rex (A monster called Anjarath) showed up. It transformed the battle into a weird free-for-all where I’m not sure who is fighting who anymore.

These cool unscripted moments are usually reserved for multiplayer gaming, so experiencing them in a single-player game is pretty exciting. I’m cautiously excited to see what else the game has in store, because at this point (~10 hours in) I feel like I’ve barely scratched the surface of what Monster Hunter World is. It’s reputed to be the most newbie-friendly game in the series, and I believe that. It’s also still quite complex, and not at all hand-holdy. That’s not a bad thing, but I just reached a point in the game where I feel I need to commit or stop playing.

I recently undertook my first hunt where I couldn’t successfully ass my way through the fight. I was defeated - pretty soundly. It’s this big rocky dinosaur monster covered in mud. Most of my attacks were deflected either partially or completely. He would charge at me, forcing me to dodge and then try to run up and hit him (I’m using a 2-handed sword at this point). 

After losing, I spent some time in the area tracking the monster - inspecting footprints and other signs of the creature’s presence. I then checked my monster journal - something I’d only given the briefest of glances up to this point - and learned that I can use my Slinger and/or weapons that deal water damage to chip away at the beast’s hardened mud armor. It also showed me some vulnerable points on its body. I’m learning that that hunts are going to require prep work: tracking, crafting materials, doing a little research and equipping the proper gear. I won’t be able to wing it anymore, I have to put actual effort in. 

I’d like to tell you that I geared up, headed back out, and buried my foe. I’d like to do that. But I was unsuccessful, and the reason for that is one of the game’s big drawbacks for me: the hunts are timed and the game cannot be paused. This isn’t inherently bad, but as a parent of 3 younger children and the owner of a puppy, committing to 15+ minute battles uninterrupted is a risky endeavor.

It’s too early for me to give any sort of well-reasoned review of the game. All I can say is at this point I’m pretty taken with it. It takes some of that deliberate Dark Souls combat, dials down the punishment a couple of ticks, and places it in a beautiful world that feels alive. And the crafting is engaging. I love the way you are hunting and foraging for your materials; you didn’t find that armor in a chest or buy it from a vendor, you built it from the scales of that dragon you finally took down in that epic 30-minute battle that had you on the edge of death near the end. The game’s aww-shucks vibe is sometimes at odds with its manifest destiny-like story sensibilities, but it’s so charming and endearing that I’m not bothered by that.

Monster Hunter World isn’t perfect, but it might be something special. 

Platform: Playstation 4, Xbox One Developer: Capcom Price: $59.99

Oh shit I forgot about the Palicos. They’re little kitty people! You make one as a sidekick during character creation. They follow you around fighting and gathering for you. You craft little weapons and armor for them and it’s fucking awesome. When you are wading through water, your Palico will get out a little raft and float alongside you because kitties don’t like getting wet. It will heal me during combat and will frequently draw the monster’s focus so I can heal, or get a few opportune shots in. Kitty is love.

There was a little weirdness at first when I realized that the Palicos are all servants in the game. They basically act as squires for you. One acts as a housekeeper in your home. They run the canteen and cook your meals before serving them to you. But they always seem so goddamned enthusiastic and happy! And the little cooking cutscene is one of the best things that has ever happened.

If you don’t like this video clip, we can’t be friends.

[funkymeihem-fiction]

Hot Headed, Cold Hearted- Chapter 2 (A Meihem Fanfiction)

She’d been so excited that she had shown up at the launch bay four hours before the ship was supposed to leave the next morning. Everything looked to be ready, she had checked and re-checked all their gear several times over, and probably checked on their food rations every time she had passed by their box, just to be ultra sure. To her relief, they were not the kind that they had sent her off with before, the kind that tasted like they had been at the bottom of some bargain bin for a few centuries too long. Winston’s new stipend had bought them all good food and good supplies, and she made a note to thank him later. He had even provided a book about northern wilderness survival, though she had a feeling that was for the junkers. He also hadn’t even seemed surprised by her wish to include them in her mission, and had made an effort to be polite about the matter when she presented him the paperwork to bring them along…True, he had that little hitch in his voice the entire time he subtly tried to suggest bringing Pharah or McCree or literally anyone else instead of them, but she had been firm. She was going to make this mission work, and improve junker/omnic relations at the same time. Or at the very least, she hoped they’d want to kill each other a little less… She sat on the edge of the launch pad wall, eating a piece of toast and jam and enjoying the morning as Snowball sat beside her, its screen showing a series of dots as it ran a few last-minute diagnostics. The sun rose slowly, dawning cool and clear and bathing the Gibraltar sky with pink and yellow, dotted with fluffy orange clouds. She had even managed to wake up before the local seagulls and there was blissful silence save for the faint crashing of far-off waves against the rocky cliffs, and the crunch of toasted bread between her teeth. Best to enjoy the silence and calm while it lasted, she knew. Even an entire flock of gulls couldn’t compare to the shrill screeching laughter of Junkrat when he got started, and he brought chaos with him wherever he went. The junkers would have to be monitored carefully, all the while trying to also monitor Bastion and its strange behavior, and she had to be prepared to break up any fights and try to smooth things over to begin the healing process... This morning would likely be the only reprieve she would have for the next several days and she needed to enjoy it while she could. The last bite of toast and gooseberry jam left a few crumbs that she brushed from her lap, and there was a soft tweeting trill and a flash of Ganymede’s familiar yellow feathers as the Eichenwalde cardinal fluttered about her in a little circle, landing by her feet and pecking at a few specks of bread before tilting its head up at her. With a few hops, it launched up onto her foot, then her knee, and then onto the wall beside her, tapping its beak curiously at Snowball’s animated screen. The little cryo-drone startled itself awake, emoticon eyes blinking before offering the bird a ^ ^.

Mei smiled, clasping both hands over her chest at the sight. “Aww! Good morning, Ganymede. I guess if you’re here, Bastion isn’t too far behind. Are you both ready to go?” Ganymede offered no reply besides another tilt of its head, ruffling its feathers before fluttering off once more. Sure enough, the loud clanking of the Bastion unit was audible now and steadily moving closer. Rounding the corner, it tucked its gun behind its back and made a rather shy little wave with its hand as its avian companion hopped in circles atop its head. “Doo-da-da.” “Ni hao, Bastion! Good morning to you too. Are you excited for our first trip?” She asked, pulling herself off the stoop to approach the bot. “Wee!” It beeped in the affirmative, then looked past Mei and offered Snowball another wave, mechanical fingers clicking as it wiggled them. Snowball uttered a little warbling noise as it hovered up to join them both, floating just over Mei’s shoulder before it gave the Bastion unit a happy face and a scrolling screen of marquee hearts. Bastion looked a little taken aback, scratching at its chin as its eye turned half red in the middle. Was it…blushing? “Deeeeee-doo-doo-deeeeee.” Mei was just about ready to set off the emergency alarms and summon the entire base over to see this display of nonstop adorableness, but she made herself take a breath, smoothing her hands over the front of her coat before taking Snowball in both arms. “Now Bastion, I did ask you to come a little early because I wanted to just go over a few things with you, is that okay?” She received a nod and continued, “Okay, good. I know you received my message about the junkers joining us and I just wanted to be certain how you felt about things before we leave.” Bastion looked down to the ground, uttering a grinding noise that went down at the end. It didn’t sound very sure at all. “I know that they’re a handful and how they’ve acted towards you and the others. But they’ve been making a lot of progress in other areas, and I think that with a little more work, we might be able to help them see that you and Zenyatta and the rest don’t have anything to do with what happened in Australia and that they can start to let go of those prejudices, right?” With a hopeful nod, she placed a gloved hand on one of the gears of its boxy shoulder. “And you’re the friendliest, cutest bot I’ve ever met. I think in no time at all they’re going to like you too! I’ve made them promise not to do anything mean to you or Ganymede, so we just have to be…um, diplomatic. And I want you to know that if they give you any trouble at all, you should come to me at once. But I know we can do this together, and get our mission done successfully. Speaking of…” She opened her tablet, the holographic display flickering to life over it. Sure enough, Bastion’s interest peaked immediately, stepping forward and searching the map for a moment before bringing its pointer finger towards the little block of northwest Canada. It uttered a questioning chirp, turning towards Mei once more and tapping it twice. “Dee-Bwoo-woo?” “Maybe you can tell me why you’re so interested in this place? You’re my friend, Bastion, and I want you to know that you can tell me anything. What’s in this forest? Why are we going there?” Her brows knitted in concern, biting slightly at her lower lip. The bot paused, then uttered a series of tones that went up and down, staring at the spot on the map and tapping it again before looking at her expectantly. No new information to be had there, but she offered it a little wary smile and adjusted her glasses. “Okay, well…I’m sure we’ll find out once we get there, and then maybe you can tell me? I mean, tell us?” There was a sudden commotion approaching them from the other side of the base, and they all knew at once who it was. “Nan, I’m telling ya! I already got everything, we both do!” Junkrat’s familiar high-pitched whine sounded from the corner. “I’ve got at least fifty pounds of gear for this gig, I don’t need any more. I didn’t even know there was such a thing as ‘long underwear’, did you Roadie? The hell is that all about? Not enough to just constrain this magnificent Australian donger with regular underwear, now I gotta wrap my entire self in it?” Mei sighed, shaking her head. The two junkers entered the docking area, flanked the much smaller figure of Ana, who was fussing over the young man relentlessly, holding a backpack and a sack lunch as she struggled to to reach his head and place a knit snowflake-patterned toboggan atop it. She didn’t seem put off by his crude manners at all, hurrying to keep stride with his limping gait. “And you may be putting up a ruckus now, but you’re going to be glad for all this once you actually get there. My ex-husband is from Canada and I know exactly what the two of you are up against-” Junkrat screeched to a halt, whirling upon her. “Ex-husband?! What’d he do to you, Nan? You want me and Roadie to deal with him while we’re there?” Roadhog rumbled and punched one gigantic spiked fist into his palm menacingly. Ana rolled her remaining eye, shoving the backpack and lunch into Junkrat’s arms. “Jamison, that is Fareeha’s father you are speaking about, you would not be doing anything even if you were anywhere near him. I don’t know why they’re sending you all into a little town like Tentpeg, but it’s going to be cold. Colder than you know. So I packed you a few extra things.” She began rummaging about in yet another bag she pulled from out of her coat. “Extra mittens for if you lose the other two pairs, a scarf or three, some warm socks so you don’t lose that other foot, vitamins, hot cocoa packets, a sweater…Sorry for the tacky sweater, it was the only one I had that might fit you.” Junkrat wrinkled his nose as she pulled out the sweater, giving it an unimpressed look. “The hell is that thing, a cow? Eh, least it looks less bulky than that coat y’got me.” “That’s a moose. And the sweater goes under the coat.” “The fuck it does!?” He blurted out, before his bushy brows lifted suddenly and he clamped both hands over his mouth as Ana began rapidly admonishing him for his language. Mei coughed a little, turning away to stifle her laugh. She had also been wondering how her Australian cohorts were going to handle a Canadian winter. Roadhog, at least, seemed to be handling the concept a bit better. He was already wearing a powder pink knit hat with a pig face and ears, atop his already pig-themed mask. The now double-headed Hog accepted his own winter bag with little more than a low grumble, even when Ana began wrapping at least a mile’s worth of striped scarf around his thick neck. Mei swiftly came to their rescue, bustling over to try and shoo the concerned sniper off them. “Miss Amari, I’m sure they’ll be all right. I have everything checked over, even extra thermal blankets and toothbrushes just in case,” Mei said, before leaning up to the woman’s ear. “And I’ll send you pictures of them all dressed up in the snow, if you want. I plan to take a lot!” Ana offered her a wrinkled grin, her eye creasing with amusement at the thought. “I thought you’d never offer, habibati. Honestly, I’d offer to go with you if I wasn’t busy here. To keep a watch on those two, mainly. But, I suppose they’re even better off with the best cold weather expert we have. But you’re going to have your hands full with two junkers and an omnic, you know.” “I know,” Mei sighed, deflating slightly before straightening up with a little huff. They both turned to eye the men, watching as Junkrat tried to convince his partner to trade hats and was swiftly rebuffed. “But if I can deal with those two out in the desert, I’m sure I can deal with them out in the snow. If they get too hot under the collar, I can send them to chill out! This time they’re going to be on my turf, right?” “That’s the spirit, my tough girl.” Ana clapped her gently on her shoulder and turned to go, before halting abruptly. “Ya lahwy! I almost forgot!” She dug around in the mysterious depths of her coat yet again before withdrawing one more knitted hat, a pale yellow with a pom-pom on top and a buttoned strap, before going to latch it onto Bastion’s boxy head. “I wouldn’t want you to feel left out, hm?” ` The bot touched it reverently, beeping its thanks. “All right, I’ll get out of your hair so you can get on your way. Good luck in Tentpeg, be safe out there! Be good! And warm! Stay warm!” With a last wave, the old sniper rounded the bend and vanished. Junkrat, still wearing his new toboggan despite having no shirt on, lurched up beside Mei and stretched upright, placing his hands on his hips to watch her go. “Best nan I never had, ain’t she? Top ratings. If only she didn’t make the cookies with raisins in ‘em…” Roadhog hefted a crate of their supplies in one arm, lumbering up the ramp to the ship with a low rumble. “Well I know you like the raisin kind, mate, don’t got to rip my head off about it,” Junkrat snapped. “But yeah, you’re right, let’s get moving. The sooner we get there, the sooner we can get the hell out. Don’t much fancy the thought of all that snow. You’re real lucky I’m the gallant gent that I am, lovey, braving the ice and gales like I am, all in the name of love! That right there, that’s romance, that is.” “You’re the one who insisted on coming,” she reminded him with a little sly look. “But this is a lot more snow than the places you’ve been sent so far. Romance or not, I don’t want any of you to hesitate to ask for help if you’re having trouble.” “Eh, she’ll be right! Not to worry!” “I mean it, Jamie. I know you’re better at handling the heat than I am, but I lived in Antarctica. It takes a while to get used to the ice and snow. And the cold…Sometimes, the cold can…” Her voice trailed off, expression going slack as her gaze went far away. Mist on her breath…Ice crystals on her eyelashes…the last green dots of a dying battery…a collection of mugs standing like gravestones…nobody even knew they were th- “Oi!” A gravely voice sounded in her ear and then came the familiar nip of sharp teeth against her ear, jolting her from her reverie. “Come on, Mei, come on back.” “Sorry! Sorry, sorry about that, was just thinking again,” she said, shaking her head to clear away the negative thoughts, the little things that always seemed to get caught in the cobwebs in the recesses of her brain. When Junkrat merely squinted at her in some concern, she quickly leaned up to nuzzle her nose against the side of his jaw. “I’m fine, don’t worry. And I’ll be there if you need help with the cold…” She looked around quickly to make sure nobody was in earshot, leaning up again and pretending to adjust his silly toboggan. “I know lots of ways to help keep you warm, I mean?” Steam practically shot out of the man’s ears and she could have sworn his grin widened enough that the edges of his mouth were meeting on the back of his head, barking out a sharp “YEAH!” before lowering his voice back to…well, his usual customary loudness. “Yeah, show me lots of that! Survival techniques! Sexy, sexy survival techniques! Come on, come on, we better get a move on!” He grabbed her hand and started dragging her up the ramp to the ship, eager to get the trip started, ice and snow be damned. ***

Junkrat seemed a little less sure of things a few hours later, with his face pressed to their ship’s window, staring down at the vast landscape of green and white forests below them. He’d begrudgingly put on his moose sweater, though it hung silly and loose on his bony frame, and Mei had even caught him giving a few doubtful glances towards the bulky winter coat sticking out of his pack as the temperature outside continued to drop the further north they went. “Turn the heat up already, will ya? I can feel it in my toes, you want me to lose my foot? You wanna answer to Nan’s wrath when she learns you didn’t keep poor ol’ Junkrat from freezing to death like you promised?” “No, it’s better to get a little acclimated to the cold slowly. And it’s barely even a chill, you’ll be all right.” Mei smacked his hand gently away from the temperature controls, her eyes still on the ship’s onboard map as they neared the tiny dot on the map that represented the town of Tentpeg. The trip had been mercifully quiet and without trouble thus far. Bastion had gone idle almost immediately, and though the junkers had watched it distrustfully at first, eventually they had grown bored and left it to its own devices. For now, Roadhog was snoring softly in his seat in the back, already snug in his winter coat and pig hat, while Bastion sat in a resting posture with its legs drawn up and its boxy body lowered to the ground, only its flickering eyelight hinting that it was alive at all. Mei barely seemed to notice the cold at all, checking the autopilot as she glanced over their schedules again. “We should be arriving in Tentpeg in just a few minutes, everyone. Landing at 5:25 PM. -6 Celsius, so not too bad so far. We can check into our hotel and then erm…have a quick look around the next morning, before we need to head out.” Junkrat’s eyes bulged slightly when she mentioned the temperature, finally relenting and scrambling to grab his parka, awkwardly shoving both arms into it before fumbling with his mittens. “-6 she says, and ‘that’s not bad’? I’ll be a Junksicle in seconds.” He paused, then turned to Mei with an all-too-familiar edge to his grin. “Oi Mei, if I was a Junksicle, would you lick m-” “Ānjìng! Shh!” She tossed a scarf into his face, interrupting him and leaving him to unwind it as she focused on the manual controls. The ship was starting to approach a crude landing area- Really more of a clearing outside of town than an actual landing area- as the snow fell steadily outside, blowing gently against the windshield. The town below was barely that. She had read that Tentpeg had been established for logging, ages ago, and had always been a tiny and rather destitute place. There had been attempts to rebrand it into a tourist destination, but it was further north than tourists really wanted to go. Now the only things left here were a few scattered service buildings and houses, and the hotel they would be staying at while she looked into things. The ship wavered slightly as she set it down, turning around in her seat. “Okay, everyone! We’re here!” The others began stirring. Coats were put on, seatbelts clicked, and bags were gathered, before they all stood at the cargo doors. Mei clicked the button, and with a whir, they slowly opened. The cold creeped in as soon as the seal breached, little flakes of white and blue swirling around their feet. The little climatologist stood at the front, bearing the brunt of it as Snowball hovered beside her. Her companions did not face it quite as bravely. Ganymede fluffed up and retreated underneath Bastion’s hat, squirming under the rim for relative shelter, and even the stalwart Roadhog, larger than ever with his layers of coats and gear, took a half step backward. Junkrat squealed and hid behind his bodyguard as though he would shield him from this like he had shielded him from everything else. But the cold had already swept in, and any warmth left in the ship was smothered and gone within seconds. Mei, already rose-cheeked and smiling comfortingly, gestured them forward. “I know it’s a little chilly at first, but you’ll acclimate. Why don’t we all get to the hotel and get warm and settle in, and we’ll all have dinner and celebrate your first cold weather mission. Go science division…and friends! Hooray, us!” Junkrat, already huddling miserably into his coat and scarf with barely his eyes peeking out in a little strip just above, scrambled forward. “Are you trying to bloody kill us, woman?! Standing around in the cold? This ain’t natural! Which way’s that hotel? Can’t believe I ever agreed to- WAAAUUGH!” He rushed past her, sights set on the buildings up ahead, and stepped off the ramp. His weight hit the top of the smooth white and he immediately sank in up past his knees, toppling forward as he tried to brace himself before falling. He vanished from sight into the snowbank, leaving behind a distinctly Junkrat-shaped impression like some warped version of a snow angel. The rest of them stood watching, Bastion tilting its head as Roadhog snorted a low, “Idiot.” From the safety of the ramp there was a flash, as Mei grinned and took a picture.

[clarencebells]

Creature Feature: Niffler

The Other Slytherin (Series)

Masterlist

Newt Scamander x Reader

Summary: Ladies and Gentlemen, The Niffler.

It had been a few weeks or so since Newt moved in and your life had changed quite drastically. First and foremost you had to get used to sharing your space with another human being, so that meant changing how some things were placed and organized. You and Newt fought a bit on where certain objects should be placed since you were more partial to organization, while Newt was partial to efficiency.

You also had to set some rules around the house when you learned that Newt was the ‘organized chaos’ type. He knew exactly where everything was, except they weren’t done neatly. You, however, were the neat, ‘everything-has-its-place’ type. It drove Newt mad that you were so particular on placement but he complied when you argued that you compromised with having several and possibly dangerous plants inside your home. You would have preferred to keep all plants on the balcony outside, which you had been doing before Newt moved in, but Newt insisted that some plants thrived better indoors, he even switched out your fake vines for real ones.

Both of you had made an extra effort to teach Dougal about all the plants inside the flat, from those he could safely nibble on and those that he was absolutely forbidden to go near. Dougal picked up on anything he was taught quickly, so it made things easier.

You and Newt were finally getting into a natural rhythm as the days passed, but one day, something quite peculiar occurred. 

“What in the world...” You muttered as you stared at the empty drawer that was supposed to be filled with your silver utensils. You checked the other drawers to see if perhaps Newt had moved them again, but you were baffled when each drawer you opened was either empty or had things missing. 

You could feel your breath quicken and your heart start to hammer in your chest as you even checked your cupboards for any of the silverware, only to realize some of your pots and pans were missing too and then something even worse occurred to you. You ran to your china cabinet opening it gently, despite your haste and opened a large, ornately decorated box. When you saw that all contents of the box were missing too, you screamed.

Newt came rushing from his room, wand at the ready as he had Dougal cradled in one arm, he nearly tripped over himself upon entering the living room. 

“What is it? What’s wrong?” Newt asked in a slight panic as he walked to your side. 

You couldn’t even form words as you just shook the empty box in front of him.

Newt stared at the box, unsure of what you were trying to convey, “Is it a boggart?”

You gave him an unimpressed look as you shakily told him, “My spoons, Scamander. My collection of decorative spoons, given to me by my grandmother, all of them, gone! All our silverware is gone! Even some of the pots and pans are gone! We’ve been robbed!”

“That’s impossible. Your wards are practically impenetrable.” Newt tried to reason, and that’s when you realized, that he was right. You made sure that no other human, muggle or wizard could enter your home unless they were invited in and you wards easily reflected simple spells, such as a summoning charm. You narrowed your eyes as you looked around, replacing the box back into your china cabinet.

“No human being can get past my wards and summoning charms are virtually null, so that can only mean that some manner of creature stole my spoons!” You angrily declared as you took out your wand and quickly revised your wards to prevent any creature from entering or leaving. 

“Do you think whatever stole from us is gone?” Newt asked you as he looked around, seeing if anything else was stolen.

“No, whatever stole them is still here. There’s an enchantment on one of those spoons that prevents it from leaving my vicinity without my knowledge. My initial panic made me forget about it, but it’s definitely still here in the flat.” You explained.

“You must really love these spoons,” Newt observed.

“They are family heirlooms, Scamander. Passed down from generation to generation, each spoon made by the current matriarch of our family. Reminding us of our humble beginnings as silversmiths.” 

“I never would have thought spoons could have such a rich history. So how do you plan on tracking down this mystery creature?” 

You turned to Newt a bit perturbed at his question. “Track? There is no tracking needed.” You waved your wand effortlessly as you cast a spell, “Accio, Regalia Spoon!”

Within seconds something came hurtling towards you and Newt was quick to react, shielding you as he encased the object in a bubble. However, it was no object that was caught in his bubble. It was a creature as you had guessed, a black, fluffy creature with a long snout and webbed, clawed feet. It tried to escape the bubble to no avail as it simply kept bouncing off the walls. It tried to run, hoping to roll the bubble with it but it remained stationary. Soon enough it grew tired and just stared back at you and Newt.

“Aww. It’s fluffy.” Newt cooed.

“It’s a thief!” You growled, scowling at the creature; it shook in fear of your furious tone and demeanor. “Return what’s mine, little thief and perhaps I’ll consider not turning you into a purse!” You threatened the shaking creature as it quickly dug deep into a pouch on its belly and began to dump the contents. You and Newt were gobsmacked at the number of items that kept coming from the creatures pouch, some of them weren’t even yours. There was even several hundreds worth of galleons and jewels that could even make the Queen of England envious.  “Merlin’s beard! It’s a criminal!”

“I think I actually know what this creature is,” Newt said as he continued to stare in fascination at the creature who was still emptying his pouch.

“Are you being serious right now? You are more concerned with the kind of creature it is, rather than the fact that it is literally dumping millions worth of stolen property on our floor!” You exclaimed in incredulity as you watched the pile of treasure at your feet continue to grow.

“It’s his nature, he can’t help taking such things.” Newt calmly explained.

“He? And what do you mean ‘such things?’” You asked as you waved your wand, commanding the pile to organize itself. Seeing the mess irked you and you made sure to return what belonged to you, back to their proper places. Everything else organized itself from coins, jewels, miscellaneous kitchenware, small weapons and what you could only guess to be potion ingredients.

“Shiny things. This creature is a Niffler. I’ve seen them before in Gringotts. Furry little creatures, notorious for being attracted to anything glittery.” 

“If this thing came from Gringotts, then we should return it to them, along with this mess.” You said indicating the pile of items that now occupied your floor. As if understanding your words, the Niffler began to shake his head furiously as he made begging motions with his paws.

“I don’t think he likes that idea.” Newt interpreted. 

“Why ever not?” You asked, indulging him.

“Maybe they treat him poorly?” Newt guessed, to which the creature nodded in earnest. The creature then turned to you and widened his eyes, making them shine with crocodile tears as he repeated his begging motion.

“What’s it doing?” You asked Newt, a bit perturbed at the creature's actions. 

“I think it’s begging you not to turn him in,” Newt replied, the creature nodding again as it pleaded with you. “Aw. He’s apologizing. Can’t we keep him?”

“Keep him? What, like a pet? Oh, absolutely not! That thing--”

“Niffler.” Newt corrected.

“That niffler, stole from us!”

“But he’s sorry! See? Look at that face, how can you deny that face?” Newt pouted along with the creature as they both looked at you with doleful eyes, even Dougal, who had been a silent observer to the entire thing, mimicked them. 

Your eye slightly twitched in frustration and soon enough you sighed exasperatedly. Newt tried to contain his smile at your wordless acceptance. You turned from the three of them and returned to the kitchen to continue what you had been planning on doing before the entire mess began, to start dinner. 

Newt smiled at the little Niffler as he popped the bubbled it was encased in and carried it and Dougal to Dougal’s playpen. 

“That mess better be cleaned up by the time I’m done the cooking, Scamander! Or so help me, I will turn the both you into decorative baggage!” You exclaimed and Newt winced at the threat as he looked towards the assortment of items. There was no real way to return them all to their rightful owners so the only thing he could do was to submit everything anonymously to the Ministry’s Lost and Found.

A/N:  Shiny! Watch me dazzle like a diamond in the rough, strut my stuff; my stuff is so Shiny! *dances to the beat* something a little less adventurous and more comic relief lol

@sinuhmyn-apple @myrtus-amongst-the-stars

[aura-likes-all-the-things]

His fucking jump SENT me

Hermes: “Well, you know, Jay, I have been running for a long time. My entire life, which is about four million of your lifetimes. And, I don’t know if it helps or not, but it doesn’t stop. And there’s nothing bad about that, ‘cause there’s energy in it. And sometimes it’s nice to slow down and look out and…enjoy the view but, there’s nothing like the wind in your hair. So, if you’re gonna go fast, ✨at least have fun with it ✨”

*friendly but also slightly unhinged laugh (like always)*

[clarencebells]

Mercy

As The Bell Tolls (Series)

Clarence & Mort

Summary: Clarence likes puppies. Even the big murderous kind.

The night had been an exhausting venture. Bruised and sore from battling with the Cerberus, Mort sat up from his bedroll and the first thing he checked for was Clarence’s presence. She was nearby, that much he could tell, but he couldn’t see her within the vicinity. He sighed, knowing exactly where she would be. With a grunt, he stood and made his way to where he had sealed the cerberus pup.

Sure enough, as soon as he was within hearing range, he could hear Clarence’s voice soothe the creature.

“Aww you’re just a big, lovable, puppy that was being controlled by a crazy, power hungry meanie!” Clarence cooed as she rubbed the large, three-headed dog’s belly.

Mort didn’t make his presence known quite yet as he watched the girl interact with the pup. For a useless, magicless fleshling, Clarence's capacity for kindness and compassion was boundless. He supposed it was only natural, seeing as she was a pure soul. A soul that he was only using to keep him alive until he recovered all the pieces of his cloak. That was the only reason he stayed with her and kept her alive, or at least that’s what he kept trying to convince himself. 

He wasn’t sure when but he'd grown fond of the little fleshling, her continuous cheer, her lively and optimistic look on life and of course her endless kindness, all this despite the cruelty the world had dealt her and the darkness and chaos that surrounded her. However, like all humans, she had her moments. Moments of doubt, of fear, of anger, that caused him to feel uneasy. And as a son of Death, wavering feelings were something he could not afford to have, especially concerning a small blip in the course of time, a fleshling that would one day fall prey to one of his brothers’ scythes, or perhaps even his own.

Mort’s thoughts were interrupted when he heard Clarence shriek, he figured it wasn’t life threatening since he heard her giggle right after. Still, he approached just to make sure she didn’t accidently injure herself or worse.

“Ah, Morty look at this! Look, look, he can do tricks! He knows how to sit and lay down and even roll over!” Clarence said excitedly as she spotted the dark-haired boy walking leisurely towards her. She got up from her crouching position and hastened his approach by dragging him along.

“Ow! Be gentle!” Mort slapped her hand away from his arm and rubbed away the sharp sting she’d caused.

“Oh! I’m sorry! I forgot you’re still sore. Isn’t your healing magic working or something?” Clarence apologized as she looked at the boy who was covered in several cuts and bruises, the worst of the cuts were only beginning to heal.

“My healing is fine, it’s the poison that’s slowing it down,” Mort explained.

“Want me to get you more of those herbs and grasses?” Clarence offered, but Mort shook his head and approached the pup that was trapped within an eight-pointed pentagram.  “I suppose I should dispose of this creature before it attracts the attention of your ‘muggles’.”

“Nooo! You can’t kill it!” Clarence protested, standing in front of the enormous three-headed dog, that wasn’t even fully grown yet. Her short and stout stature was almost laughable when compared to the large pup as if her diminutive size could actually protect it, but despite her size, she had a certain power over the death boy that made him pause, even just to bicker with her.

“Why the hell not?!” His quick temper surfacing as once again he went through the same argument with her.

“Because it’s not nice!”

Mort gave an exasperated sigh, “That thing tried to kill you just hours before.”

“It wasn’t his fault he was being controlled!” Clarence argued for puppy’s behalf.

“That doesn’t excuse him for trying to eat you!”

“He’s a puppy! He doesn’t know any better!”

“And what exactly do you plan on doing should I let it live?”

“Um...” Clarence hesitated, having not really formed a plan to what t do with the pup.

“As always, you think with your heart, we cannot keep that thing! There is no place for him in the surface world!” Mort pointed out, causing Clarence to become desperate in trying to save its life.

“But we can’t kill it! He’s just a puppy! He doesn’t deserve to be killed just because a meanie was giving him bad orders! Please, Morty, don’t do this! There has to be some way we can save him.” Clarence begged, trying to appeal to Mort’s humanity, one he continuously denies to exist because he wasn’t ‘human’.

Mort scowled, a part of him screamed that he should just shove the insolent girl to the side and do away with the bothersome pup, but the other part hesitated and wondered if he was willing to risk upsetting, not only his companion but also the ire of the god that the pup belonged to. He couldn’t very well return the pup because it had already set foot on the surface world and the only way to return it was to call upon the god that owned it, a god he wasn’t keen on seeing. 

The rumors of his disappearance were sure to have already reached into the underworld, he definitely did not need that uppity god to see him in this state, reduced to taking the form of a short-life and having his fate bonded to a child.

Mort gave another exasperated sigh and Clarence waited with bated breath for his decision. He looked at her and her disgustingly hopeful gaze and his scowl only deepened as he prepared himself for what his words would incite. 

“There is one thing we can do-” Mort began but he was interrupted as Clarence squealed and accosted him in a tight embrace that sent most of his injuries screaming in protest. “OW! ow, ow! Let go of me you ridiculously, excitable female!”

“Oh, oops!” Clarence immediately released him but Mort gave her one of his infamous glowing-red-eye-glares that would have made any other person cower in fear. “Sorry. So what’s your idea?”

They waited for hours but soon enough, the young wizard and his companion finally arrived in woosh and clap, landing gracefully on their feet within the clearing and Clarence greeted them with gusto. 

“Hi Mr. Scamander! Hi Miss!” Clarence waved them over as Newt approached with an awestruck expression as he saw the large Cerberus puppy.

His female companion, however, approached with her ever stoic expression as she walked up to Clarence and gave her a pat on the head. 

“What type of trouble have you two gotten into this time?” She questioned. Mort walked forward and pulled Clarence away from the woman, his distrusting eyes remaining on the stoic woman as he explained their situation.

“We found this dog here. Don’t know what to do with him, but since creatures are your specialty, we decided to let you handle it.” Mort lied easily, but the stoic woman’s eyes narrowed in suspicion. 

“You found it here?” She asked.

“Yup,” was Mort’s curt reply. The two of them stared each other down for a few moments but t their little contest was interrupted when they heard Clarence, who had walked up to Newt, begin explaining all the tricks that the cerberus pup knew. Newt of course, was attentive while simultaneously fawning over the puppy who was happily basking in all the attention he was getting.

“You’ll take care of him, won’t you? He really is a good boy!” Clarence told them as she gave the cerberus pup one last belly rub.

“Of course. We’ll do our best. I actually know a place in Greece where he’ll be able to live the rest of his life with relative ease and no worries.” Newt replied, assuring the young girl that the pup would be in good hands.

“You’ll be able to free him from the seal, right?” Mort asked. He could remove the seal himself but he didn’t want to reveal his capabilities to the stoic woman.

“It will take time, but I’ve broken similar seals like this before.” The woman proclaimed and Mort nodded as he called to Clarence so they could continue on their own journey.

Clarence bid Newt and the Miss goodbye, being sure to give the Miss her customary hug before following after Mort.

They silent for a few moments but soon enough, and Mort actually felt himself relax as he let the silence engulf him, but it didn’t last for long as Clarence once again filled the silence with her endless chatter.

“Thank again for not killing that puppy, Mort. I know it's not your thing but I’m glad you were nice enough to show him mercy.” Clarence smiled at him and Mort found himself feeling...content at her happiness.

“I’m not nice.” Mort declared.

“Sure you are!” Clarence countered.

“That’s because you make me, be nice.” 

“I can’t make you be nice unless you’re already nice to begin with!”

Mort gave another sigh as he looked down at the girl walking beside him. “You’re really oblivious to the power you hold over me, aren’t you?” He muttered quietly to himself as Clarence continued to be blissfully unaware that she had death watching over her.

A/N: aaaand done! What is this you may ask? I have no idea either! Just a thing from my brain that I decided to put down into writing. ahahaha...okay goodbye now. also, just to clarify the clarence in this is not me, I just couldn’t think of any better angel names to give her lol 

also inspired by the song ‘Mercy’ by Shawn Mendes I know, completely not the point of the song right? blame my brain.